AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“You’ve lost me.”
“Well, when that dream takes off, we’ll both be busy. You’re going to handle the business side of things, remember? I’m shit with spreadsheets. I’ll need you, Rayne.”
“And I’ll be there for you,” I say. “I still don’t get what Kirill has to do with this.”
She rolls her lips to one side and then the other, considering her words carefully. “You know I love Yuliana like she’s my own. She’s amazing. But…”
“But what?” I ask, already on the defensive. “You can’t say you love my kid and then say ‘but.’”
“Relax; I’m getting there. You two are my family, Rayne. But at some point in the future, I won’t be able to do daycare or school pick-up on days you can’t. I might be working and won’t be able to take her for an entire Saturday when you need a break. Small businesses are a lot of work. So when that happens, wouldn’t it be nice to have someone else to depend on?”
Natalia’s words shouldn’t strike me as shocking, but they are. They knock me off-kilter a bit.
She won’t be here to help me forever.
Harmony joked about Natalia and I being married, but she isn’t far off. We share a lot of meals together, she hangs out at the house most evenings, and she’s helped me more than anyone with Yuliana.
I know it isn’t fair to expect any of that from her, but it’s hard to imagine a world where she isn’t here in this same capacity.
These new fears mingled with the anxiety from my run in with Kirill are officially way too much for me to be thinking about in one evening.
“We do not need to be talking about this right now,” I say firmly. “No matter what happens, I’ll be there to support you. Things have always been hard for me as a single mom, but I can figure it out with or without you.” Natalia gasps, and I reach out and pinch her cheek. “Of course, that being said, I’d much rather do it with you.”
“Good. That’s what I thought you said.” She stands up and stretches her arms over her head, yawning deeply. “Well, not that this isn’t the most interesting conversation I’ve had in weeks, but I really need to go to sleep. I’m exhausted.”
I walk with her to the door. Not that it’s a very far walk. My open-concept living room and kitchen is only eight feet wide and it takes five paces to get from the kitchen sink to the front door.
“Thanks for sitting with her, Nat. And you really don’t have to do this as much as you do. Really. If you’re busy or you don’t want to come over, just tell me so. I’ll understand. I don’t want to be a burden to—”
Natalia’s hand juts out and her finger smooshes across my lips to quiet me. “You and that baby girl are not a burden to me. Don’t ever think that.”
My eyes suddenly feel misty. “Okay.”
“Being honest with you is not a problem, either. So I have no problem looking you in your eyes and telling you that you should try again with Kirill.”
I frown. “I don’t know if that’s a—”
“It might be a terrible idea,” she interrupts. “But you owe it to yourself—and to Yuliana—to consider it.” She opens the door and backs out onto my cracked concrete porch. “Okay, I’m off my soapbox now. Goodnight.”
“‘Night ‘night, Aunt Natty!” Yuliana calls from the bathroom.
“Goodnight, sweetheart!” Natalia yells from the front porch. Then she smiles at me and trots down the sidewalk to her car.
The second I close and bolt the door, Yuliana is ready to get out of the bath. It figures. She has a sixth sense for when I’m about to sit down and take a break. Usually, at that exact moment, she needs my full and undivided attention.
She gets cranky when I insist on re-shampooing her hair after seeing the half-assed job she did herself, and she gets even crankier when I accidentally get soap in her eyes. But by the time she’s sitting in front of the mirror in my bedroom and I’m combing her hair, we’re friends again.
“Can I have braids in the morning, Mama?” she asks.
“Maybe. If you can get up and eat breakfast really fast, we might have time.”
I’ll have to take a shower tonight and eat a protein bar instead of a real breakfast in the morning, but I can probably swing the braids.
She grins and vibrates back and forth in excitement. “I can wear a dress, too!”
“Sure. You have all those stretchy play dresses we just got for daycare. Maybe you can wear the outer space one or—”
“I want the racey one,” she declares proudly.
