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He didn’t say anything for a long moment, the party in the background the only noise I can hear. There is a pit in my stomach, knowing whatever he says next is going to rock my world once again.
As if he hasn’t done enough damage lately,I think, drumming my fingers on the table.
“I’m at my engagement party.”
The world stops. Time freezes and nothing seems real. I know he’s planning on marrying Britney. After all, he’d said as much when he received the divorce papers. I thought he would let the dust settle first, but apparently not.
I cackle and shake my head, tears blurring my vision. “You did not just say you’re at your engagement party.”
“I did.” Irritation clear in his tone. “Stop laughing, Tracey. This isn’t funny.”
“Oh, I think it is, you bastard. I think it’s hilarious that not only are you not picking up your daughter because you’re at an engagement party—that she should have been invited to, by the way—but you’ve apparently also managed to recover enough of your shrunken balls to get engaged before our divorce is even fucking finalized.”
“This is why I left you.”
I snort, getting up from the table and pacing around the kitchen. “I thought that was because you slipped and your dick fell into the blonde secretary that’s half your damn age!”
“I’m not fighting with you right now. Not today. This is a good day, Tracey. The best I’ve had in a long time. So forgive me for enjoying life!”
“You’re choosing a woman over your daughter! Deja needs you, Jake. You’re breaking her heart.”
Jake sighs, the music in the background growing softer. “Tracey, I can’t keep doing this. Tell Deja I’m sorry, but I can’t come get her.”
He ends the call, and I’m left standing in the kitchen trying to figure out a way to tell my daughter that her father isn’t coming to get her. How do you tell a child her father won’t be there for her because he’s at his own engagement party—an engagement party he didn’t invite her to. She’s going to be crushed when I tell her that he isn’t coming for her. If I tell her why he’s not coming, I don’t think her heart will ever recover.
After taking a deep breath, I open the door and walk outside to find my daughter sitting on the curb, her phone in hand.
“He’s not coming, Deja. He called me and asked what was going on. I told him about our argument and asked him not to come and get you. We need to work this out, and we can’t do that if you’re at his house.” The lie rolls from my lips with practiced ease, but inside… inside I. Am. Dying.
Deja’s face crumples, even as tears flow down her cheeks. She takes a deep shuddering breath, as if she’s trying not to let her emotions overwhelm her. “I hate you.” Her voice sounds almost deadly.
“I know,” I whisper, biting back my own tears. “I know you do.”
Deja brushes away the hug I offer, getting to her feet and shaking her head. She stands on the curb, rocking back and forth on her heels. Her chest rises and falls as she takes deep breaths, her hands clenching and unclenching at her sides.
“Why weren’t you enough? Why didn’t you try harder to make him stay?” she asks, her voice shaky.
“Honey, you can’t make somebody stay, not once they’re already gone. If I had thought it would help, I would have done everything I could to get him to stay.”
“You don’t know that it wouldn’t have helped. You just let him go.” She shakes her head, taking another step back when I reach for her. “Don’t touch me. Don’t look at me. Don’t pretend you care about how I feel. If you cared, you would have saved our family.”
Deja takes off toward the old treehouse that still stands in the backyard. I watch from the driveway as she climbs up the ladder and shuts the trapdoor behind her, deciding that talking to her now won’t do any good.
She needs time to heal her heart, just like I do.
I walk inside, heading straight for the room Jake and I used to share. My blood boils at his latest example of not giving a shit.
His belongings are long gone, tossed on the lawn the day I found out he was cheating on me. Thankfully, Deja had been on an out-of-town trip with the youth group she belongs to. Looking back, I’m glad she didn’t see the show I’d put on for the neighbors.
I’m sure they’re still talking about me to this day.
The closet is emptier than it had been only a couple of months earlier, but my wedding dress is still hanging in the back. After pulling the dress out of the bag, I walk down the stairs to the fire pit in the backyard. Music is blasting from the treehouse, Deja lost in her own little world.
Lighting a fire doesn’t take long, the heat of the summer keeping the wood dry. Bright flames lick up at the setting sun as I toss my dress into the fire and watch it burn. The white fabric turns black before turning to ashes and smoke. Years of my life spent in one relationship go up in smoke, the love long gone.
It’s time for a new beginning.
Chapter Two
