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“I hear you, baby girl, and I have a solution. How about we let everything settle, and after my father passes, we revisit this conversation. We have many options available to us. Worse comes to worse, I’ll kill Bethany and steal her baby.”
I laughed, but when Joseph didn’t join me, I stopped. “You're kidding, right?”
He opened his other eye and pierced me with his gaze. His tenor low and gruff. “That bitch has gotten on my last nerve. So, no, I’m not kidding. Not when she’s standing in the way of our perfect ending.”
“We can’t do that. It’s illegal,” I mumbled, my cheeks heating up. It wasn’t like the thought hadn’t crossed my mind, but we weren’t monsters.
“I would do all the illegal things to keep you happy, baby girl. I’d serve time with a smile on my face if it meant knowing that you were content. I love you. You know that right?”
Joseph had his most serious face on, so I looked at him, equally serious. “I love you, too.”
“Fuck.” Joseph pulled away.
“What’s wrong?” I sat up dragging the sheet over me a little.
Joseph shot me a hot look and I almost melted. “I want to fuck you and I don’t have permission yet,” Joseph spat.
My clit tingled. “Oh.”
“Yeah, oh. I want to be deep inside that pretty, pretty cunt, and fucking Logan is at work. If I fuck you without him, there will be hell to pay.”
That sounded kind of nice. “At least we’ll get orgasms out of it, right?” I let the sheet drop.
“Not if Logan is super pissed. I bet he wouldn’t let us orgasm at all,” Joseph pouted.
He loved getting his. Since I couldn’t figure out if he was on the right track, I stopped moving the sheet off my body. Joseph let out a tortuous groan. I wanted to say I knew exactly how he felt.
“Let’s get dressed, baby girl.” Joseph headed over to his closet to look through his clothes.
“You don’t want me to just stay here?” After last night, I couldn’t help feeling exhausted.
Joseph peered over at me. “Is that what you want?”
I shrugged, “We could meet up for lunch. I know you probably want to work on at least a few cars before we leave for our trip.”
“I don’t even want to go on this fucking trip,” Joseph sneered.
“It would give you closure, Jojo.” I knew it was fucked up to throw that in his face, but it was true.
One thing that gutted me about losing my child was that I never got to hold him or her. I was in surgery when they removed my child from my body. I didn’t get to hold them once. I didn’t get to look down at them and tell them that I would never forget them. That I wished things were different. That I loved them with all my heart. It wasn’t fair. I needed time to let go.
Joseph’s situation may be different from mine, but grief hits the same. He could be angry with his parents and still mourn his father’s death. He could hate his parents and still be heartbroken that the man who raised him was no longer in this world. Despite the fucked-up way their relationship broke, Joseph always had a soft spot for his father. That’s why it surprised me that his father hadn’t tried to stop Jojo from leaving and instead sided with his wife.
“Hey, where did you go just now in your head?” I hadn’t realized Joseph stood beside me fully changed.
“I was just thinking some bad thoughts.” I didn’t want to make his mood worse.
“What kind of thoughts?” He wrapped me in a bear hug, and I leaned against him for comfort.
“Like how I wish I was able to say goodbye to my child before they took him or her away.” My eyes watered. My mother used to say grief came in waves that lasted a lifetime.
“I hadn’t thought of it like that, and I should’ve known this would remind you of what you lost. Are you sure you want to go with me?” Joseph looked down at me, briefly trailing a stray tear down my cheek with his finger.
“I’ll be fine. I want to be there for you, and I think this will be good for us. Especially Logan.” Joseph and I needed to find our footing around our new dynamic. It wasn’t perfect, but it would be nice to feel settled with both my men.
“If you’re sure then.” Joseph kissed the top of my head. “I’m going to turn the coffee maker on and get out of here. Let me know if you need anything or come to the shop if you're missing me, baby girl.”
“Will do, Jojo. I’ll see you later.”
