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His arms tightened across her back. ‘Foolish woman,’ he chided fiercely. ‘Your getting pregnant changed only the timing of my proposal. I’d already been rehearsing one for weeks, trying to think of a way to phrase it so that you wouldn’t reject me for trying to rush you into something you weren’t ready for. I knew that sometimes your cautious soul worried everything was happening too fast.’
‘So…you weren’t sorry?’
‘Sorry? I was glad. I loved the idea of your having my baby. I loved seeing your pregnancy grow and I loved Liam. Even though we had him for such a short time, and through all the pain and grief, I never regretted for one moment that we had had him to add to the sum of our love.’
That brought on another tormenting doubt. ‘I just don’t know if…I know how much you want a family, but I don’t know if I can ever risk having another baby—going through that kind of loss again,’ she blurted.
He cupped her face and kissed the agony from her brow. ‘We have each other. That’s what matters most to me. The giver, not the gift, remember?’
They lingered a little longer amongst the poignant memories of their beloved son and then Ryan led Nina by the hand to the master bedroom next door where the wardrobes were still divided into his and hers, crammed with all the clothes she had left behind.
‘To have and to hold, Nina,’ Ryan said thickly as they lay down on the wide bed and cuddled together in sweet, passionless intimacy, talking in low voices, reminiscing, crying, laughing. When Ryan finally glanced at his watch, he was startled to see how the time had slipped away.
‘Teresa will have made and dumped out umpteen cups of coffee by now,’ he said, urging Nina up. ‘And I have something to show you.’ He looked briefly uncertain. ‘That’s if…I assume by the number of bags that you’re not just here for the weekend?’
‘I’ve closed up the cottage,’ she said huskily. ‘George is extremely miffed with me, but Ray was all for it. He said he could manage quite well on his own.’ She had been a little hurt by the cavalier way the old man had treated her departure.
Ryan chuckled. ‘That’s because with what he’s stinging me on the sale, he can afford to employ a full-time housekeeper to boss around for the rest of his life.’
‘You’re buying the house in Puriri Bay?’ Nina was stunned.
‘Actually, you’re buying it. I was planning to put the deed in your name. I want you to know that your magical isle is there whenever you need it.’
Nina felt a flash of fear. ‘You think this might happen to me again?’
He took her hands in a reassuring grip. ‘No. From what I’ve read—and Dave Freeman has told me—dissociative amnesia is rarely repeated. It’s an isolated episode, like an accident, complete in itself.’
‘I’m going to see a doctor,’ she announced as they went back down the stairs. ‘Just to make sure.’
‘If that’s what you want—’ Ryan broke off at the sound of a high-pitched squeaking, and suddenly a diminutive, long-haired Jack Russell puppy came slipping and sliding out the door to the kitchen across the black-and-white tiles, a black sock dangling from its mouth.
‘Come back here, you little bandit!’ Teresa Robson’s large bulk bobbed into sight as Nina captured the furry fugitive and lifted him up gently in her cupped hands. ‘Oh, so you found her, then, Mr Flint. Lovely to have you back again, Mrs Flint! And aren’t you looking a picture!’ she said, beaming, as if Nina had just arrived back from a successful weekend shopping trip.
Nina, aware of her blotchy, tear-swollen face, pillow-ruffled hair and crumpled clothes, smiled ruefully back. ‘Nice to see you, too, Teresa. And who’s this?’ Her gaze moved from the tiny puppy in her hands, who was trying to lick her salty chin, to Ryan’s sheepish face.
‘Ah…I only bought him yesterday. He hasn’t got a name yet,’ he admitted. ‘I thought you might like to think of one,’ he said, and her heart melted a little more.
‘How about Bandit?’ she suggested, gently removing the sock and handing it to the housekeeper, slipping easily back into the old routine. ‘Could we have that coffee Ryan asked for in the lounge, Teresa, if it hasn’t gone cold?’
