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“Oh, my poor baby,” she cries, and goes down on her knees before me, capturing my hands in hers. “You dear, sweet child. How could he do this to you?”
It’s hard to look at her like this. She should be yelling and screaming, not being sympathetic toward me. “Mom, please get up off the floor.”
“To be abandoned by a man in your time of need. He’s too cruel. I can’t imagine what you must be feeling.”
“Mom, I’m begging you. Sit down, please.”
Rieta comes to my rescue, helping Mom up and onto the sofa while Mom wails about Laz.
Suddenly, she clenches my hands even tighter, her eyes wild with grief and anger. “Tell me the truth. Did he force you? Did that animal abuse my daughter under my nose?”
I yank my hands from hers. “No! It wasn’t like that.”
But there’s a nagging voice in the back of my mind.
Laz didn’t always ask before he touched you. That first night you found him in your bed, he got his hands all over you and then held you down and forced more orgasms from you.
And when he took your virginity on the hood of his car, he didn’t listen when you tried to tell him to slow down.
He replaced your birth control pills with sugar pills.
Only an abuser would do that.
I made excuses for the things Laz did, but did I overlook his sinister behavior because he’s so handsome and charming?
Mom strokes my hair, her touch loving. “You look scared, darling. Whatever you say about him, I’ll believe you, no questions asked. I’ll hold your hand at the police station and back you up no matter what.”
Over her shoulder, Rieta is chewing her lip, her eyes huge.
It’s what I’ve always wanted, Mom’s unconditional love and support. I see suddenly how I could find my way back into my family’s good graces after my terrible behavior.
Point the finger of accusation at Laz.
Blame everything on the man they are already primed to hate.
Laz was far from an angel, but in my heart I know what I did, and I’m not going to pretend otherwise.
I shake my head. “It wasn’t like that. We’re both to blame for what happened. I knew sleeping with Laz was wrong, but I did it anyway.”
Mom reaches into her oversized handbag and draws out a handful of garments that I recognize with a jolt. “Are you sure? Because I found these in your room.”
Tasha’s lilac wig. Tasha’s see-through high-heeled stripper shoes. Tasha’s white G-string. Seeing those gaudy items in the light of day in my mother’s hands makes me break out in a cold sweat.
“Darling, tell the truth. What did he make you do?”
“Laz didn’t do anything. I bought these ages ago. I was stripping for weeks before you even met him.”
“You were stripping? But why?” Mom’s expression is horrified.
I wish I didn’t have to go into this right now. There’s nothing else to say but the unvarnished truth, so I go ahead and tell her that I took the job because I hated being at home. I wanted to leave as soon as I could.
Mom’s expression turns sour as she listens to me. “You’re protecting Lazzaro. I know you are.”
I take my stripper clothes from her hands and shove them to the other end of the couch behind me. “If you don’t believe me, you can call Peppers. The bouncer Jimmy will tell you everything you want to know.”
“Lazzaro knew about this, though, didn’t he?”
“Mom, you’re a broken record. Not everything is about Laz.”
