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‘And where is he now?’ he asked. A million miles away, he hoped. Outer Mongolia wouldn’t be far enough.
‘When we broke up he said he was going to London. His brother lives there and he was going to stay with him to try and straighten himself out. I hope for his sake he was able to. But, that said, I’m just so glad he’s out of my life. Being with him had me fearing for my sanity. I hardly knew who I was any more. Sometimes I can’t believe what a fool I was to trust him and believe that he would change. One thing’s for sure…I’ll never give my trust so easily to a man again.’
Her emerald eyes glistened briefly and Jake swallowed hard. He hated the idea that she wasted even a second of her time thinking about her ex and what he had put her through.
‘Anyway, I don’t know why I’m standing here telling you all this,’ she finished.
‘I asked you to. What about your family? Were they supportive when they found out what was going on?’
‘My parents and my brother are in America. He moved out there first and they followed. They’ve started up a business out there. Anyway…’
With a shrug Caitlin briefly met his eyes and then looked quickly away again.
‘I didn’t want them to worry about me so I didn’t tell them. I made my bed and I had to lie in it. They gave me the chance of going with them when they left but I opted not to take it. Besides, they always taught me it was important to stand on my own two feet, and I wasn’t going to go running to them the moment I was in trouble. I wanted to prove to myself and to them that I could turn my life around and be proud of myself.’
‘Whilst that’s commendable, I thought families were supposed to help each other out when one of them was in trouble?’
‘Do yours? Help you when you’re in trouble I mean?’
Jake hadn’t expected her to turn the question on him. For a dizzying moment he found himself awash in a sea of feelings that he usually tried to submerge…feelings of pain, confusion and a sickening sense of being abandoned by life.
His mouth drying, he answered, ‘No… They don’t. They can’t. I don’t know who they are. I was raised in a children’s home.’
Caitlin’s bewitching green eyes immediately softened. ‘Oh, Jake…I’m so sorry.’
The suggestion of concerned sympathy in her voice was like a gun pointed straight at his heart. He immediately sought to deflect it.
‘Don’t be. I learned very quickly not to depend on anyone else for either my happiness or my wellbeing. I survived the experience—that’s all you need to know. That’s all anyone needs to know.’
Twisting her hands together, she took a few moments before commenting, ‘You’ve done more than just survive, Jake. You’ve made an amazing success of your life.’
‘Is that how it looks to you?’ The question was painfully ironic.
‘Anyway, regarding my own family, we’re…let’s just say we respect our differences. They have their life and I have mine.’
‘You mean you haven’t told them that you’ve joined the band?’
‘I will tell them…eventually. But, just not right now.’
Jake shrugged. ‘It’s your call.’
‘You said that you learned not to depend on anyone else to make you happy. What about romantic relationships, Jake? Have you had maybe one or two that haven’t worked out?’
‘Who hasn’t?’
A reticent smile suggested that discussing his own experiences was the last thing he wanted to do. It wasn’t hard to understand why he should feel that way. Nobody welcomed talking about the things that had hurt them. Yet Caitlin couldn’t help wanting to know more. Despite her vow never to easily trust another man, the idea of perhaps trusting Jake was strangely compelling. After all, he knew what it was like to have been badly hurt by someone and wouldn’t knowingly inflict similar hurt on someone else…would he?
Drawing in a deep breath for courage, she asked the question she’d been longing to hear the answer to since talking to Lia.
‘My friend Lia—the manager of the shop where I worked—she told me that she once read in the papers that you’d been married.’
