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“You should. You’re part of this household.”
For how much longer? I wanted to ask about Svetlana, and if there was any truth to their upcoming marriage. I didn’t think my heart could take that, so I played the three wise monkeys. If I didn’t hear or see it, I wouldn’t speak about it.
That scenario can also blind you. Put on your big girl pants.
If Jane Eyre could confess her love over a century ago, then I could do it now.
I gathered my courage and asked, “Am I a part ofyouas well, Kristoff?”
His gaze closed off. “Ekaterina, you and me, what you want from me…It can never happen.”
His words shattered me. Regardless, in for a penny, in for a pound. If there was anything I’d learned from my kidnapping, it was that life was short. So I put all my cards on the table.
“It doesn’t have to be like that. We can make this work.”
“You called me Hades when you met me. You couldn’t have been more spot-on. If you stay with me, I would lure you into darkness. I would get you killed.”
The gravel in his voice was pronounced, as if the words were being pulled out of him. They touched a soft spot inside me. Despite his reputation for being a cold-hearted killer, in his own way Kristoff was trying to do right by me.
“You’re afraid you’ll get me killed? Funny, I’m afraid to never get the chance to live. Because being with you, but not reallybeingwith you, is not living. It’s just existing.”
I put down the gauze and kissed his jaw, leaving with the taste of him on my lips.
11
KATYA
The next evening I dropped into a couch with a bowl of popcorn on my lap. Yuri plopped next to me, a box of Cheerios in his hand. I loved movie night and was happy to finally share it with Yuri. After he took a bullet for me, he was elevated to the status of a ‘Bloody One,’ entering Kristoff’s inner circle. In doing so, he’d earned a ticket to the monthly movie night. It felt wrong that he was being recognized for being shot, but when I saw the pride in his eyes, I didn’t have the heart to rebuke it.
“I can’t believe the rest of the guys bailed on us like that.” We were supposed to celebrate Yuri being released from the hospital, but instead all we got was crickets.
“That’s okay,” Yuri said, positioning himself to get comfy. “I know they can’t make it.”
“You know more than I do.” I put on episode one ofClash of the Gods.
Yuri popped a Cheerio into his mouth. “It’s the thought that counts. They’d be here if someone hadn’t nabbed that little girl.”
I recoiled. “Wait. Someone’s little girl is kidnapped?”
“Kristoff’s brother’s.” Yuri blanched. “Forget I said anything.”
“How can I forget something like that?” My mind filled with dark scenarios, and I completely forgot about the show until Yuri scoffed. His eyes were glued to the screen.
“Did that raccoon just change into an elephant?”
“Are you telling me that Kristoff’s niece is kidnapped?”
“Fuck me,” Yuri said, aghast, ignoring my question. “Did that guy just stop a spear with his pinky?”
Guess the subject of Kristoff’s niece was off the table.
“His index finger,” I corrected him.
“What the hell kind of movie is this? And why aren’t they talking English?”
I leaned back and rolled my eyes. “It’s a Chinese martial arts fantasy series.”
“Ah.” Yuri grabbed a beer off the coffee table, looking like he needed one. “What’s wrong with good old Hollywood?”
