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He walks over to the door, standing there, waiting for me to follow. I walk to the doorway, stopping in front of him.One last thing before my walk to the gallows.I let out a deep breath, along with, “You were right.” He cocks his head and eyes me curiously. “Those panties would have been an unnecessary barrier. This feels so much better.”
I step forward, so I’m standing directly in the doorway, but decide I’m not done yet. “Those sounds you heard from the shower. They weren’t made from thoughts of anyone outside this room,” I declare without turning around to see his reaction.
As I walk down the stairs, I glance over my shoulder to see King is still standing in the doorway of his bedroom with his eyes narrowed on me. “Are you coming?” I ask. King’s eyes soften as though I broke him from a trance. He makes his way to me and follows me down the stairs.
I walk into the dining room with King directly behind me. Stryker’s on the phone, and he’s talking loud enough that we can hear his side of the conversation. “Tell her ass to get here, BJ. This is not negotiable.” His back is to us, and his free hand runs through his hair. “If she would answer her fucking phone, I could tell her myself.” Stryker turns around and sees me. “Thank you, BJ. I’ll see you both soon.” He hangs up and sets his phone on the table.
Stryker walks over to me but seems cautious about what he should do. The tension in his body is easily noticeable. His eyes look like he wants to devour me, but his body is forcing him to stay back. “Have a seat. Apparently, no one can’t be bothered to show up to a meeting on time.”
I take a seat in the chair closest to me. King follows me, standing behind my chair, and placing his hands on the back of it. “Where is everyone else?” he asks.
Stryker lets out a long sigh. “Well, Marcela is being stubborn and doesn’t think we should even have this discussion. BJ is bringing her here now.”What discussion is that? My style of execution?
“She’ll come around. She was betrayed, so I think it’s fair for her to be pissed,” King counters as he taps the top of the chair.He’s right. She may never forgive me, and I don’t know if I even deserve her forgiveness.
Stryker ignores that comment. “And Conrad is probably up in his room sulking as well.” His eyes, filled with pity instead of desire, meet mine as he finishes that statement.
“I’ll go get Conrad,” King offers. “I’m sure he just needs some time too.” His hands leave the back of my chair, and I can hear him step away. Before he leaves the room, he makes sure to really drive home his point. “I would just like to point out, though. This team is not together. People are refusing to be here and can’t agree on how to move forward. Can you remember the last time that happened? I sure can’t.”
My eyes look down, staring at the table because I know he’s blaming me for all of this. He has every right to. “So maybe, just maybe, the next time I tell everyone I have a bad feeling about somebody, and they’re literally going to tear this team apart, listen to me.”
King leaves the room, and Stryker moves to sit at the head of the table. I don’t lift my eyes to look at him. “Don’t listen to him, Little Fox. We’ll get everything cleared up,” he encourages.
“Stryker, don’t...just don’t,” I say, tears building in my eyes.
“Nat, you don’t have to…” Stryker tries again.
I look up at him, tears threatening to spill down my cheeks. “Stryker, I said don’t. King’s right, and whatever the team decides is what I deserve. I did this to myself. There was a choice, and right now, I don’t know if I made the right one, but it’s still the one I made.”
Conrad
Sittingaloneinmyroom, deep in thought, I’m still trying to wrap my head around everything that’s happened over the last week with Spitfire.Should I even still use her nickname?This should be simple, with little thought required. She lied to us, to me. We should all be ready to toss her out and throw away the key. But I can’t. I still care for her. I’m so hurt by her betrayal that I don’t want to see her, but at the same time, I yearn to touch her, to lay eyes on her, and just make sure she’s okay. It’s fucked up, thinking about her being locked in the cell in the basement. On the flip side, I’m hurt that she stabbed us all in the back. In my case, stabbed me right in my goddamn heart. I think I may love her, and it’s making this whole situation extremely difficult to process. My head is all kinds of fucked up by this beautifully frustrating woman.
How did I miss all the signs? Was I really so blinded by her?As I think back, I remember a few moments which I know now should’ve stuck out to me. Her records were so pristine; that should’ve been my first red flag, but she was fresh from her job with the PI company, and I assumed it was her first and only job. The way she took down Donovan with those badass moves, far more skilled than any fresh agent would know, should’ve been my second clue.Shit, I’m getting hard just remembering her that night. It was our date night. UUUUGH!I just lied so freely to the team, my family, saying her records stated she had some training in hand to hand. I didn’t question her loyalty or motives, I just assumed she was here for the right reasons. Maybe sheishere for the right reasons. We haven’t heard from her, listened to her side of everything, why she lied to us, why she broke us…broke me.
In retrospect, I should’ve dug deeper into her records when she joined the team. King kept going on and on about her. Maybe we all should’ve fucking listened to him a little more. It would have proved him right and ruined me and Stryker in the process. But I think it would have saved us all a lot of time and trouble in the end. We wouldn’t be in the situation we are now, having doubts about a team member, someone we love. We wouldn’t, and I wouldn’t feel the gut-wrenching pain of betrayal.
I hear heavy footsteps stomping down the hall towards my room, tearing me from my thoughts, then there’s a knocking on the door. Getting up to see who it is, I swing the door open and there stands King. I’m sure he’s come to ask why I haven’t shown up to the meeting we’re supposed to be having with Nat. It’s time for Nat to explain her side of things. While I want to hear it, I’m also not sure if I’m ready to see her yet. I’ve been up here stalling, but I guess my time’s up, and now, I’m being summoned.
“Conrad, it’s time to come down and listen to Luci tell us how and why she fucked us,” he says as he walks right by me, taking a seat in the computer chair next to the bed.
“Fuck, King, do we really have to do this right now? Can’t you do it without me and just relay what she says? I’m not sure I’m ready to look her in the eyes and hear what she has to say,” I tell him, trying to hide the pained expression on my face.
Ignoring me completely, he watches me walk over and sit down on the bed. “We need you to be there, to have this talk with Luci, so she can explain to us all how big of a piece of shit she is to our face. We all need to hear it,” he tells me sternly before continuing on.“The girls are late because Marcela is being an asshole, so BJ is getting her and heading this way. You haven’t shown your face either, so I told Stryker I would come grab ya. He is down there with Luci now. How are you doing with all this? You look like complete shit.”
Yupp, completely ignored my first statement since I just told him how I’m fucking feeling about this...about her.I know what he said is true; it’s been three days, and I haven’t been taking care of myself. I haven’t shaved in days, and no one on my team has ever seen me with facial hair. I am always clean-shaven, which is a huge clue to how this is affecting me. I’m sure there are bags under my eyes since I haven’t been sleeping, my mind constantly racing. I’m hoping my glasses cover them up, but by the way King’s staring, it seems they’ve betrayed me as well. “I know, I’ve just been up here thinking. You know so much has happened since she has been here with us, I’m just processing it.” I take my glasses off, set them on the table, and lift my hands to my eyes, rubbing them forcefully before lowering them back down slowly and sighing.
King looks at me, and I can see he has some sympathy for me. “I know, man. I honestly feel bad for you and Stryker. I don’t mean that disrespectfully. Luci definitely got her claws in deep, especially in you. Probably more than anyone else on this team, you gave her a big piece of you.” He reaches up to adjust his ponytail before continuing on and shifting his mood.King is being extremely nice right now; it’s fucking weird. He is never like this to anyone besides BJ. I wonder if Nat was finally starting to earn his trust too?
“With all that said though, man, how did you not know something was off with her? It’s your job to catch this type of shit! You’re the best, how did you not catch her background was fucking lies? I get that pussy can be distracting. Shit, I even know how distracting Luci’s pussy can be. I know she was your first, but you gotta get your head on straight. Go downstairs, look her in the eye, and show her she didn’t break you, even if she did. Because from where I’m sitting, seeing you up here, looking the way you do now, she got exactly what she wanted. We all need to show her she didn’t tear apart this fucking team.”
“I know, King! Don’t you think I’ve been beating myself up already over her? Over the lies, you don’t have to be such a dick. I know there was stuff in her records that didn’t add up. I admit I lied to the team when I saw her skill with fighting, claiming it was in her background report when it wasn’t. Hell, everyone should be pissed at me as well. I lied. I wasn’t honest. I’m just as guilty as she is! I betrayed my team when I covered for her. I’m sorry, but I NEVER, in a million years, would have if anything in me thought for even a second she wasn’t being anything but truthful to us. Admit it, King, you’ve been an ass since Kruz was killed, and we all just thought you were being dramatic and spiteful.” I did, I thought King was just pissed because he wanted our team to stay just us. He was against us adding anyone else, so when Ingram brought Nat in, I just thought he was still mad we had another person with us period. Never did I think he would be right about her.
“Listen, I know I haven’t been the best or easiest person to deal with this last year or two, alright! Let’s just forget it all and move forward. I love this team, you guys are my family, and I don’t want anything to change that. You’re all I have. Hell, even I began to fall for her charms, so I’m as guilty as the rest of you when it comes to being manipulated by her charisma and lies. There were moments when I felt things beginning to change between us, where I could see her as part of the team and even see myself falling for her. Then I saw the text. It was the proof I needed to know without a doubt she was an associate of Volkov’s and that all my suspicions were true. I was furious, not only at her but at myself, for almost falling victim to her deceit.”
“I guess it’s time then. Let’s just rip off the band-aid and head down there,” I concede.I can do this. I can see her. King’s right, I need to show her, or at the very least make her believe, that she didn’t break me.King gets up and heads to the door turning to look at me since I wasn’t moving. “Give me a minute to gather myself and some of the info I collected, will you? I’ll be right down, I promise.” King just gives me a nod and starts to walk out, but as he’s leaving, his phone pings.
Stryker: Nat won’t talk without Alexie here. Will one of you grab him on your way down? Thanks.
