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That was two months ago, and I still haven’t forgotten how that thick, fat column in his pants stabbed into the softest part of me. How his fingers felt wrapped about the nape of my neck, around my wrist. How it thrilled me when he grabbed greedy handfuls of my butt and squeezed and—
"Zara? You there?"
"Eh?" I glance at the screen. "Of course, I’m here."
"Hmm…" Solene looks at me closely. "Seems to me like you’re distracted."
I laugh. "Moi? Distracted? You know that’s not possible."
She picks up her eyeliner wand and scans my features. "I don’t know. For a second, it seemed like you drifted off."
"I’m very much here."
She continues to survey my features. "You have dark circles under your eyes. Have you been sleeping okay?"
“I’ve been sleeping just fine,” I lie. No, Ihaven’t, actually.The twathole is haunting my waking thoughts. I tossed and turned last night, and when I finally fell asleep, I dreamed of Olly. Something I haven’t done in a while. I thought I finally put his passing behind me, but maybe something like that never truly leaves you. Maybe all that happens is that the grief settles somewhere deep inside you where you can’t see it, only to unfurl when you’re feeling more vulnerable. Which I am now, thanks to Hunter-knobhead-Whittington.
"You sure? Is there something you want to talk to me about?"
"Not right now." I mean, what am I going to say? That I have a huge crush on the one man I need to steer clear of? That the more I try to not think about him, the more it seems my body is unable to forget how it feels to be around him? Nah. Best to pretend nothing happened. And nothingdidhappen. We had dinner.And you let him all but fuck you on the pool table in a place where anyone could have walked in on the two of you, and damn, but that had been hot.Not only how he made me respond, but also the fact that he didn’t give a damn that we could have been discovered at any moment. And somehow, his confidence, his not giving a damn about what that could do to his reputation, and the fact that the entire situation is so forbidden… It only turned me on even more. Ha, even thinking about it makes it all seem insane. "I’m good, really." I paste a smile on my face.
Her lips curve. "Not fooling me, but fine. If you’re not ready to talk about it, I’ll let it go."
"Thanks. I promise, I’ll tell you more when there’s something to tell, okay?"
"Hmph." With a last look at me, she turns to her mirror and begins to outline her eyelids. "We haven’t really gotten around to declaring our feelings for each other."
"That’s normal, right?"
"Is it?" She completes one eye, then turns to the other. "When my sister Olivia got together with Massimo, they declared their feelings for each other within weeks."
She’s referring to Massimo, who was once part of the notorious Costa Nostra. However, in the past few months, he and his brothers have gone legit. They funneled their assets into the formation of CN Enterprises and Massimo’s the CFO.
"By all accounts, coming clean about your feelings and marrying each other within weeks of meeting is the exception, rather than the rule," I point out.
"I know." She sets down her eyeliner, then reaches for her mascara. "Guess their relationship raised my expectations. I keep thinking Declan will announce his feelings for me, but so far, there’s been nothing."
"The two of you did take to each other right away though. You left for the US with him within days of meeting him, didn’t you?"
I wait while she finishes applying mascara. "I was bowled over by him. Once I saw him, nothing else existed."
"So, what changed?"
She picks up a lipstick and puckers her lips. "Both of us becoming so successful so quickly. He was already on the rise when I met him, and now, with his second big hit, he’s a hot Hollywood property. He needs to capitalize on his success and sign the best offers he can get his hands on. And then my big hit—which was completely unexpected…"
"So, the two of you have had to focus on your careers? It happens, right?"
"I always knew it would be challenging when both of us have such demanding careers. What’s complicating it is being in the media eye."
"You mean #solan?" I chuckle.
She pauses to smear the color over her lips, then when she’s done, sets down the tube. "We’ve barely had the chance to get to know each other, and now the media’s all over us. The paparazzi are everywhere. We can’t step out of our house in LA without being snapped. I don’t mean to sound ungrateful. This is why I moved to LA, to make a name for myself. And Declan is so talented, too—"
"So are you."
"Thank you." She lowers her mascara wand and turns to me. "It just hasn’t been easy. And now, he’s shooting in London, and I’m about to embark on my tour."
"Which has already been getting amazing reviews, by the way."
