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“Excuse me,” Birgitta said, her voice shaking so badly she could barely understand herself.
She rose from the table, causing her chair to scrape against the tile below, and her eyes searched the room, looking for a sign for the bathrooms. When she saw it, she managed to stagger over to the door and push her way inside. It was just two rooms behind the door, unisex. Birgitta opened the closest door to her and instantly went to the sink.
Leaning down, she turned on the tap and let the cold water run. She inhaled deeply, smelling the scent of the well water. It smelled like earth and metal, a smell that brought her back to reality. She scooped the water into her palms and splashed it onto her face. Cold fractures ran through her cheeks, chilling her to the very bone. It wasn’t enough, though. Birgitta kept on splashing until the water didn’t feel cold any more.
When she lifted her head from the basin, she looked at herself in the mirror above. Her cheeks were bright red, as were her eyes. Frowning, she wondered if she’d been crying. There was no time to waste. She grabbed some paper towels from the nearby pile and dabbed her face dry, all the while staring into her icy blue eyes.
“What the hell am I doing here?” She whispered to herself. “What the hell am I doing?”
Birgitta felt so conflicted. She wanted Malik, more than anything she’d wanted in years. And yet, she wasn’t sure if she was ready to throw her marriage away, to throw her family away. What would they think when they found out about this? Sure, it was innocent enough now… but what about when things started to move forward? As much as Birgitta liked to think she was a good person, she knew no amount of good was going to keep her away from Malik.
She left the bathroom not long after, trying to hold her head up high. Shame was eating away at her back, threatening to break her, but she refused to let it. Instead of a burning desire to have Malik’s body between her legs, she had a burning desire to run.
“There you are,” Malik said, rising from the table.
“I have to go,” Birgitta blurted.
All of the joy vanished from Malik’s face. “Why?”
Birgitta felt her jaw clench involuntarily. Malik reached out to grab her hands, to touch her soft skin, but she recoiled away.
“Why are you leaving? Did I say something wrong?”
Birgitta could only shake her head. “Thisis wrong,” she snapped.
Malik frowned at her, pretending he didn’t understand what she was saying.
Birgitta scoffed. “You know what’s going on here as well as I do,” she snapped. “This is wrong. I’m married.”
Malik grabbed her hands, quicker this time. There was no way Birgitta was going to escape from his grasp. He yanked her body toward his, forcing her chest to press against his, crushing their arms between them.
“Stop it,” Birgitta whispered, her breath misting onto his face. “Stop it.”
Malik leaned down to press his mouth against her ear. “I’ve wanted you ever since I first saw you,” he said harshly, his gravelly voice rough in her ears. “I won’t take no for an answer. I will have you.”
Everything inside Birgitta crumbled. More than anything else, she wanted a man to say that to her. She wanted a man to be rough with her, to take her however he pleased. With every ounce of strength, she had left inside of her, she ripped her hands out of his and stepped away from him. It physically hurt her to pull away from him, but she had to. She wanted him, but she knew she needed to leave.
“I can’t do this,” Birgitta said, so quietly she could barely hear the words herself. “I can’t.”
And then she was rushing out of the cafe, heading towards her car. She dared not to look back—seeing the pain on Malik’s face would be too much for her to bear. The only way out of this was to move forward, ignoring the wake of pain she’d created, leaving it behind her.
Chapter seven
Serve me, woman!
“Ihaveasurprisefor you,” Kent purred.
Birgitta looked up to him, her attention drawn away from her phone momentarily. She felt her eyebrows come together on her forehead, into a deep frown.
“I’ve invited your friend over,” Kent beamed. “Malik.”
All of the breath left her body, leaving Birgitta gasping silently, looking like a fish. Her mouth gaped open as her heart ceased beating in her chest. The hairs on the back of her neck stood on end. Butterflies fluttered inside her stomach, but not the happy, excited ones she was used to. They were bitter, biting, cold. They made her feel sick.
“You invited him here?” Birgitta asked.
“For dinner,” Kent said, the smile fading from his mouth. “Do you not want him here?”
Birgitta realized that this wasn’t the reaction Kent had been hoping for. Birgitta shook her head and forced herself to smile. “Sorry, you caught me off guard,” she said quickly. “It’s fine. Thank you for thinking of me.”
