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“I . . . I don’t know what to think,” Birgitta said carefully. “I know you’re not a liar. I also know that Malik wouldn’t do such a thing to you.”
Julia shook her head and pressed her lips together tightly. “How?” She asked, her voice rising. “How do you know he wouldn’t?”
“Because I know him,” Birgitta said gently. “I know him very well.”
Julia scoffed. “You’ve known him for, like, two minutes.”
“Come on,” Birgitta said softly. “That’s not fair.”
“I don’t care,” Julia said. “I’m filing a police report against him.”
Birgitta’s whole world froze. It was like everything had been dunked into the iciest waters. Her heart stopped. Her breath got caught in her lungs. Her vision started to dim and blacken at the edges.
Police report, she thought, dazed and confused.Deportation.
A raw, stabbing pain blasted through her heart. She felt her hand slap onto her chest, clutching at the skin as if she would be able to burrow through her ribs and touch it. Hollow wheezes came out of her mouth as she struggled to breathe. Her legs started to tingle and turn numb. She staggered to the couch just beside her as she processed what Julia was saying.
Police report, her mind repeated.Deportation.
“I knew it,” Julia said, suddenly angry.
Birgitta looked up to her daughter, feeling like she was a million miles beneath the sea. Pressure and weight on her shoulders and back pushed down until she thought her head was going to explode. Her ears were clogged, making everything sound dreamy and distant.
“I knew it!” Julia shouted again, this time leaning down to point at her mother’s face. “You’re fucking him, aren’t you?”
Birgitta heard the words and desperately tried to force herself into alertness. This was it, the moment she could tell her daughter the truth without spilling her deepest, darkest secrets. She wasn’t fucking him. Not just yet, but there was something going on.
“I feel for him,” Birgitta said. “Nothing is happening between us, Julia. But I do feel for him.”
Something caused Julia’s face to soften. She sat on the couch next to her mother, sighing heavily as she sank her weight into the fabric. Although they were sitting together, Julia refused to look up at Birgitta. Instead, she stared at the floor.
“Have you told Papa?” She asked, all of the anger gone from her voice.
“No,” Birgitta said. “I’m not ready to just yet. But I will.”
“He won’t be happy,” Julia said. “He doesn’t like cheaters.”
Those words brought a smile to Birgitta’s face. Years ago, they’d gotten a call from Julia’s principal. She’d been caught cheating. Had the answers scribbled up her arms, hidden beneath her long sleeves. Kent had always been a quiet parent until that day. He went crazy, shouting and yelling, removing luxuries from little Julia’s bedroom. He spewed about how she was going to be grounded for a month. His anger caused him to foam at the mouth. That’s when Birgitta stepped in and told him to relax, that it wasn’t the end of the world.
“He does not like cheaters,” Birgitta agreed, knowing Julia was remembering the very same incident.
“I won’t file a report,” she said gently. “He’ll stay in the country, for your sake.”
Birgitta couldn’t believe her ears. Hope erupted in her heart, sending warm spirals through her muscles. “Really?” She asked, feeling like an excited child. “You won’t?”
“On one condition,” Julia warned. “You have to kick him out of your house. I never want to see him again.”
Birgitta felt all of the life inside of her extinguished. How could she throw him out after everything he’d been through? After one little mistake that was all Birgitta’s fault? She’d teased him for weeks, taunted him. How else was he supposed to react? He needed love and affection and he sought it out any way he could.
“I can’t do that,” Birgitta said, hearing the despair in her own voice. “I—I can’t do that to him. He’s . . . He’s been through so much and it’s only going to get worse for him.”
Julia silently stood from the couch and moved into the kitchen, folding her arms across her chest once more. She stared at the floor as she clenched her teeth together. It didn’t take long for her face to turn red as she tried to hold in her explosive anger.
“Julia,” Birgitta said.
She went to move off the couch but, when Julia’s furious eyes glanced over to her, she stayed where she was.
“Julia, please, you have to understand,” Birgitta said.
