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A pang of guilt smacks me in the face as I register the fear in her eyes, and I know I’m being unreasonable. I’m being an asshole. “I’m sorry,” I say, but my voice still sounds angry.
Valerian rolls his eyes at me, but I see the way he watches her while remaining steady on the road. His concern wouldn’t be noticeable to many others, but I know him and Zakar as well as I know myself.
“It’s not as though I had a choice,” Abilene snaps back. My friend’s lips twitch as we notice her glaring at me. The mouse has claws.
“You could have stayed home.” Cursing myself, I know exactly why she didn’t.
Her head turns to stare out the window, and it takes her a moment to realize we’ve left the city limits. “This isn’t the way home.”
“We’re not going to your home.” Straightening myself in my seat, I wait for her protestation, but it doesn’t come. Silence falls over the three of us, and I’m glad I won’t have to fight her.
Yet.
She doesn’t realize she’s never returning home again.
* * *
Abilene
I didn’t want to leave the church.
Between the cold temperatures and home, there was nowhere I wanted to go. The church and Father Marcum are all I have left to keep me grounded. To keep me tethered to this cruel world that seems determined to break me.
After losing my best friend Yelena, I didn’t realize I had also lost the safety of her family. It took a year before my father and uncle became brave enough to touch me. To assert their dominance over my helpless body. I didn’t realize that before then, they’d been too intimidated by the man sitting in front of me.
Levan Tsiklauri.
It was unclear to me why people were so afraid of him. I grew up watching the way he loved his sister and grandmother. I didn’t see the man everyone else feared. He was just my best friend’s big brother.
Later, I discovered he was a man of darkness. A killing machine, they called him. A master of the black arts, with death in his stare and blood dripping from his pores.
Until today, I hadn’t realized the rumors impacted me, but when he stopped me, I was shocked. When he put me in his heated vehicle, I was grateful. Then he yelled, and I saw the anger in his eyes, heard it in his voice. I’d done something to earn his wrath, but I’m not entirely sure what.
Perhaps, I’m a reminder of the past. A reminder of the time when there was love and laughter in his life. “Where are we going?” I gain the courage to ask. I don’t want to go home, but I’d prefer not to be clueless, either.
He doesn’t answer me; instead, his companion does. “Our home.” Valerian had always been a mystery to me. As a man of few words, he watched more than spoke. I now find his gravelly voice to be soothing, relaxing as the heat seeps into my bones. A warmth I haven’t felt in far too long. “Are you warm enough?”
Meeting his eyes in the mirror, I nod, offering a grateful half-smile. He matches the gesture, and my gaze drops. I’m not used to men being kind to me—not in many years. Aside from Father Marcum. He’s constantly offering me food and warmer clothing for our chilly winters. I always decline because the guilt would eat at me if I took away from those who genuinely need it.
“You won’t be going back home.” Levan’s tone is soft but no less intense. I’m beginning to think he just sounds angry all the time.
“I don’t have anywhere else to go,” I respond, closing my eyes, attempting to calm the tears fighting to break free.
The vehicle stops, and my door opens, the wind immediately invading my body. “You do now.” Levan offers a hand to me. Accepting it, I stare up at the house I haven’t visited in far too many years. My feet freeze and my heart constricts with pain. Levan huffs out a breath when I remain in place before he scoops me up. “While I enjoy you in my arms, carrying you everywhere isn’t an ideal situation.”
“I haven’t been here since…”
“I know.” We share a look, one where he shows me a hint of the torment he still carries with him.
Resting my head on his chest, I whisper, “I’m sorry.” He grunts as the front door opens. A smile spreads across my face as I see Zakar. The man was always kind to me. Sneaking me and Yelena treats and sticking up for us when we’d get on Levan’s nerves.
“Who’s this?” he inquires as Levan places me on my feet inside the foyer.
“Abilene Bondar,” Levan says, his voice sounding strange as he stands behind me, taking the coat from my shoulders.
“She was small and mousy,” Zakar comments as I feel his eyes roam up and down my body.
“She grew up.” Valerian joins us, closing the door behind him, stifling the breeze beginning to steal the warmth that soothed my body.
