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I hold his gaze, his eyes boring into me. His hand flips over and holds mine, his thumb grazing over my knuckles.
He’s closer—shoulder to shoulder.
“You don’t have to lie,” he says.
“I wouldn’t lie to you, Taraven,” I say. “Look—I know you’re used to just being used, but it isn’t like that with me…withus.”
Light spills across the beach from the shelter behind us, the waves lapping at the sand on either side of us. Taraven takes a ragged breath, his shoulders almost shaking as his tail whips up more sand.
“I don’t…” he pauses, dragging his hand down his face and rubbing his jaw. “Why didn’t Jaya tell me, though?”
I frown. “What do you mean?”
He shakes his head, his brow furrowing. “When Bekah came to our crew, Jaya followed her with yellow flowers—and that was how Zandroknew. And Malix has seen flowers on Jaya, leading him to me…but what about you?Why not you?”
My eyes flit down to the sand, then back to Taraven. I guess I didn’t mention it to him, but…
“What about pink ones?” I ask.
He cocks his head. “What?”
“The night before we left Jaya, flowers led me down to engineering,” I explain. “I didn’t know what Jaya was doing; I figured she just knew I needed company, and wanted me to talk to you. Then, obviously the two of you were there talking—”
“So she did give you a sign?” Taraven asks.
I turn to face him, taking both of his hands in mine. He retracts his claws, gazing into my eyes, his eyes fading to a soft pink.
“Taraven, do you really need the ship to tell you what’s going on here?” I ask.
I raise his hand to my cheek and turn my head to press a kiss into his palm, and Taraven’s tail curls around me. He scoots closer in the sand, shuffling around until his clawed feet are on either side of my hips.
“I’ve known it since we met,” he says. “But you didn’t…”
I bite my lip and sigh. “There are things in my past that made me nervous about telling you, and I don’t know…I just figured you weren’t into me? You never gave me a sign.”
“I was waiting for you to tellme.”
I shove him gently in the shoulder and he grins, his teeth bright white in the early evening light.
“Are you kidding me?” I say. “We could have been fucking this whole time?”
Taraven lets out a loud laugh, and I have to join him. The laugh tenses my stomach and I double over, laughter continuing to spill out across the lake. I can see the glistening eyes of thecaltanover Taraven’s shoulder, their slightly bioluminescent forms the only light besides the moon.
We finally stop when we hear footsteps coming closer, and we both look up to see Malix on the beach. He has a strange look in his black eyes, his labradorite irises flashing in the twilight. His lips curl up at the sides, his brow furrowing in confusion.
“You’re…laughing,” he says. “I thought you were hurt, it was so loud.”
“We’re fine,” I say. “In fact—we’re more than fine.”
“I would appreciate being informed what’s going on,” Malix says, crossing his arms.
Taraven uses his tail to push himself to his feet, then extends a hand to help me up as well. He pulls me to standing before walking past Malix, the two of them picturesque in the moonlight as he leans in.
“Let’s go inside,” he says. “We havea lotto talk about.”
Then he flicks his tail and heads into the shelter.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
