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“Ryder, let it go. We won’t judge you. No one else is here but us. Let us be here for you; the way you’re here for us. We know you’re hurting the most. We get it,” Elias’ calm voice whispered as his grip tightened.
His words were enough to trigger the tears I’d been holding back as the sobs broke out.
“I don’t want to lose her. I just got her back. After all these cycles, I finally got her back from his clutches and now she’s on the verge of death! I failed her as a knight...I didn’t even tell her directly that I loved her. If she...if she doesn’t make it, she’ll never know. She’ll never know how loved she was in her short life. It’s all my fault. I didn’t see the signs that she wasn’t replenishing her magic. She didn’t even tell me about Midnight. I should have never allowed us to go to that exam. It was clearly a trap, yet I allowed us to go because she wanted us to. I vowed to not put her in danger, but look what happened,” I cried, the cascade of emotions crashed through me and leaked into the bond.
I couldn’t hold back anymore.
It was killing me.
I heard Elias curse before his arms wrapped around my back, joining the embrace.
I could feel all their regret and sadness. I could even feel Kai’s concern from such a distance.
Why did the gods burden me with such a role, yet they couldn’t make me strong enough to protect the people I cared about the most?
“Ryder. You need to trust in Makoto and Midnight. They’ve dealt with a lot of shit. They’re stronger than this. She won’t succumb to this either, but she needs your moral support. You have to believe the Starlight gods will heal her. Everything happens for a reason. We just have to pray that Mako survives this. We can’t give up on her,” Elias consoled me.
I nodded, unable to find the words to agree.
I knew he was right. I couldn’t give up on our Firefly.
She was our light, and I wouldn’t allow the gods to let her dim away.
If all it took was another prayer out of the multiple prayers I’d said in the last two weeks, I would do it. Anything to see her beautiful, turquoise eyes again.
Oh, Starlight gods. Thy beings of power and divinity. I plead for your divine intervention. Please give my love, Makoto Heart, strength, to fight her battle and survive. Revoke the shackles preventing her from awakening. Provide her with strength to open her eyes. You created us to protect and defend the darkness that is brewing, but we need our Queen to guide us along the path to victory. Please...if you can hear my desperate plea; bring her back to me...to us. In stars, we trust.”
I allowed my mind to drift, unable to fight the exhaustion that seeped into my bones from all the sleepless nights.
At least the darkness welcomed me with open arms, as my mind faded away; the multiple emotions ceased to exist.
How much time had passed?
Minutes? Hours?
I was unable to determine how long since I’d awakened to the darkness.
But, I felt yet another feeling take form within me; sadness.
The coldness seeped into my soul as the loneliness took hold, causing the sadness to grow.
I have no home to return to.
I wish I could feel warm once more.
I tried to remember something, as the time continued to pass, but I couldn’t remember anything.
My mind was nothing but a jumble of mush.
Was my purpose to be one with the darkness?
~DANIEL~
“Shit, Ryder!” Marcus swore as he held Ryder’s limp body in his arms, preventing him from collapsing on the floor.
I rushed over to them as Marcus laid him onto the black floor; Elias assisted to keep his head in alignment. I called forth my angel spirit; his power burned through me as I allowed my eyes to scan Ryder from head to toe.
I sighed, relieved with the results.
