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Finn moves to stand, but I press a hand to his chest.
“I can do it, Finn.”
He rolls his lips between his teeth and nods. It’s a delicate balance with him. He wants me to be independent, but he struggles with letting me go. I get it. I do. I want him with me every step of the way, but I know he won’t always be there. One day, he’ll find someone else, and I’ll be left to fend for myself.
That thought makes my chest ache, so I shove it aside.
I do that really well. I love sweeping things under rugs. I have an extensive collection of brooms.
I push up and walk toward the counter, only vaguely realizing I’m walking on my prosthetic. Learning to use it was a fucking chore, but I’m glad I persevered.
“Hey,” I say offering the girl behind the counter a small smile. “Can I get a peppermint mocha to go?”
Her cheeks flush and I feel a little flutter in my chest. It’s been ages since I’ve had sex and she’s cute.
Still, I’m not sure I’m ready for anything yet. Not sure I’m ready to put myself out there.
I scan my phone to pay for it and then lean in a little. “And hey, any way I can grab the recipe for those scones?”
Can you really blame me for trying?
She bats her lashes at me but before she can tell me anything, I feel Finn’s hand around my waist. Instinctively, I lean into him, and her eyes fall to where our bodies connect.
“Oh,” she says, clearing her throat. “Right. You guys make a cute couple.”
I don’t even bother correcting her. I just send her a wink, and Finn and I move to the pick-up counter.
“You shouldn’t let people think we’re together,” Finn says, his arm still around me. Yeah, well, if he doesn’t want people to think we’re together maybe he should be the first to step away.
Not that I want him to. I want him to stay right here, next to me. I don’t even know what I’d do if he pulled away from me.
I glance up at him and meet his serious stare.
“It’s too hard to explain. Let them have their assumptions. I’ll probably never see her again anyway.”
“We can just say we’re best friends. It’s the truth, right?”
“Yeah, sure,” I say and then, because I feel like it, I lean into him and press my lips to his slightly open mouth. He tastes like cinnamon and vanilla.
“Landon,” Finn scolds softly, his hand tightening against me. “You…. Fuck. You can’t keep doing that.”
My eyebrows slam together. “Why not?”
Finn swallows and looks away right as my drink is placed on the counter. He grabs it and hands it to me.
“Never mind. Doesn’t matter,” he mutters and then we walk outside. The cold air nips at my exposed skin and I pull my sweatshirt sleeves down over my hands, carefully cradling my coffee between them.
When we make it to Finn’s car, he opens the passenger side door for me, but before I slide inside, I ask, “If you want me to stop, I will. I never want to make you feel uncomfortable.”
His jaw works back and forth as he eyes me, and he shakes his head. “I’m not uncomfortable. Forget I said anything. It’s fine.”
“You sure?”
“Yeah, Landon. I’m good.”
I offer him a small smile and sink into the car. Yeah, maybe best friends don’t kiss like that, but I fucking like it. I don’t know why I do, but I don’t want to stop. Just like everything else Finn and I do, we do it because we want to.
I like kissing him. It feels nice and it’s just one more way I feel close to him.
