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“It’s fizzy and sweet, but if you eat too much, you feel sick.” I still couldn’t resist it.
“The perfect combination?” Mark asked me.
He’d always listened when I talked, and now was no different. His eyes were on me, and I could tell he was paying attention to what I was saying.
“I think so.”
The waitress set our drinks in front of us and took the order number. I sipped the float, the sweet, fizzy drink settling in my stomach.
“Can I try yours?” Mark rested his elbows on the table. Muscles rippled along his forearms. It was clear he’d worked out while in the military.
I slid the glass across the table, watching as my straw disappeared between his lips. He sucked, and all I could think about was his lips on mine. Would he taste like root beer or lime?
“I don’t know which one I like better.” Mark pushed his drink toward me, and I used his straw to taste it.
My nose wrinkled at the lime flavor. “I think I prefer the root beer.”
While we tasted each other’s drinks, we leaned closer. Our lips were only a few inches apart. When we were kids, we’d sneak kisses whenever we could, and this was one of those moments that we would have indulged.
My face flushed, and Mark raised a brow as if he knew exactly where my mind had gone. I was so innocent back then. I wasn’t worried about what I would do after graduation or whether Mark would leave. I’d naïvely thought we’d stay in town. He’d work for his dad, and I’d stay home, get a job at a local bakery, but still be home to help with my sisters.
It was sweet and domestic, and now that I knew the end of our story, one hundred percent foolish. I had no idea he’d been harboring this secret plan to get out of town.
I would be smart to learn from the past. There was a good chance Mark would take Kendall back to the only home and school she’d ever known. Whatever itch made him leave the first time would come back around. He wasn’t someone who’d stay in town.
I’d never leave my family, and he’d never be content in our hometown.
I wasn’t sure why Mark wanted to relive our teenage dates or if he was thinking of our history when he’d made the casual suggestion of going for a walk. The whole evening felt so familiar that it made me long for something I shouldn’t want. No matter how good it felt to be around him, it didn’t mean I’d ever trust him with my heart again.
ChapterEight
MARK
When I’d walked Sophie home from the ice cream shop the other night, memories bombarded me. As teens, we’d sneak touches and kisses on the way home. By the time we’d arrived at her porch, I limited any affection to one chaste kiss on the cheek. I was hyperaware that her father was most likely watching us, and I didn’t want to be disrespectful.
I’m sure he was aware that we weren’t entirely innocent, but I wouldn’t flaunt it in front of him. It was the same reason I’d held off on having sex with Sophie. I respected her too much. Over the years, I’d regretted not taking my chance when I had it. I might not get one again.
When I leaned into her space at the ice cream shop, I saw the way her cheeks flushed and her lips parted. It was the perfect moment to lean over and kiss her, but we weren’t teens who were infatuated with each other anymore. There was pain and rejection mixed in there.
We were friends. That would have to be enough.
Besides, I saw the moment when hurt shifted through her expression, and then her eyes shuttered. Whatever reason she had for saying no to my proposal at eighteen hadn’t changed. I wasn’t good enough for her then, and I wasn’t now.
I didn’t regret having Kendall. She was the most important person in my life, and I was forever grateful she was mine. But I wasn’t naïve enough to think that Sophie didn’t feel somewhat betrayed by the fact I’d held off having sex with her, but then lost my virginity to the next woman who showed interest.
In my mind, Sophie rejected me, so I was free to do what I wanted, even if my heart wasn’t in it. I wanted to prove that I’d moved on, but it only made everything worse. I’d effectively ended any chance of reconciliation with Sophie when Melanie got pregnant.
Empty one-night stands didn’t do it for me. It made me realize that what Sophie and I had was precious, and I might not find that with someone else.
I’d focused on Kendall and tried to put Sophie out of my mind. There were little updates from my mother over the years, but it only made me long for what I couldn’t have.
But now that I was back, I was continually drawn into her presence, placing myself in her sphere. It was either a strong desire to torture myself or my body knew what it wanted, even when my mind didn’t.
Unfortunately, I couldn’t control how Sophie felt about me. Just like I couldn’t control her answer to my proposal. It had driven me crazy over the years. I’d never known why she’d said no, but I hadn’t stuck around to ask, either.
I ran my fingers through my hair. I wasn’t what she wanted. My mind had instantly run with me not being right for her. And that had hurt. I’d secretly thought she was too good for me in high school. So, when she’d said no to a future with me, it hadn’t come as a surprise. It reinforced everything my father said.
“You ready to meet Drew at the arcade?” I called up the steps to Kendall.
