AllFreeNovel
Share Us
After he’d seen the hurt I’m sure was evident on my face when he told me how he’d enlisted, he’d proposed. It felt rushed. Like he hadn’t planned on asking me to marry him. It felt empty. Not at all how I imagined that moment.
I’d said no. I had to stay to help my family. I couldn’t help raise my sisters if I was traveling and moving around at the will of the military. “So did you.”
He’d wanted to escape and to make a man of himself. Someone who would make his father proud. I had my doubts that anything would help in that department, but he’d been determined. I’d wanted him to get peace, and if enlisting helped him get that, then I wouldn’t stand in his way.
He frowned. “I didn’t get everything I wanted.”
Was he talking about me? Hope flooded my chest despite the rational part of my brain that was telling me he wasn’t mine and never would be. “I guess that’s part of being an adult.”
My response was generic because we weren’t friends or confidants anymore.
He nodded tightly.
“Are you back in town for a visit?” I asked, continuing with safe small talk as we slowly made our way to the front door.
Outside, the sky had lightened slightly.
He turned to face me. “I moved back.”
My heart fluttered in my chest. “You moved to Annapolis?”
He nodded. “It’s the perfect place to raise a child.”
I barely restrained the wince at the mention of his child. “Oh, right. Of course, it is.”
For a few seconds, I’d forgotten his betrayal. At eighteen, I’d stupidly hoped he’d come back for me. That he’d tell me raising my younger siblings wasn’t my responsibility. That I had an amazing future ahead of me, if only I grabbed on and took it. But then it all came crashing down.
He wasn’t free to be with me. He had other responsibilities, and so did I.
I wanted to ask if the mother of his child was here, too. If they were together, even if they weren’t married. But I wasn’t privy to the details of his life anymore.
“I never thought you’d move back.” The pain of him leaving was sharp in my chest. It dulled over the years but came roaring back to life with his appearance.
He was quiet, as if considering his words. Finally, he said, “Things change once you have kids.”
“Right.” I wouldn’t know, as I’d never had any. I’d just raised my sisters as if they were mine. It was a good reminder of how different we were. He’d been in the military for the past ten years, traveling the world and having amazing experiences, while I’d stayed right here, getting my degree from home, raising my sisters, and then finally opening the bakery.
I was a business owner. He was a father. We had nothing in common. As kids, we were escaping the reality of our homelife. For him, it was the expectations of his father; for me, it was the pressure to step in and take on my mother’s role after she died.
“Thanks for the water.” His gaze was swimming with an emotion I couldn’t decipher. “It was great to see you.”
I nodded, unable to say those words because this moment was bittersweet. It was like encountering the one thing you’d always wanted but could never have.
Then he was gone, and I regretted all the things I didn’t say.I miss you. I want to see you again. I want to know who you’ve become. I want to show you who I am.
I locked the door behind him and reset the alarm. Then I checked the clock on the wall to note I was twenty minutes behind my early morning routine. I did things in the same order every morning because I knew I’d get it done before opening. There was a comfort to that rhythm. Mark’s presence had thrown me offbeat.
I usually felt pride when I took in the white wainscoting, the frothy pink paint, and the dark wood tables and chairs. The marble counter was my recent splurge. I wanted customers to feel decadent when they came inside.
Now it seemed meaningless.
How could one encounter erase all my progress to get over him these past ten years? Instead, I was right back where I was at eighteen. When Mark told me he had no choice but to enlist, that everything in his life had led up to that moment. I was crushed. I couldn’t think about anything other than him leaving me.
He’d asked me to marry him, but there was no ring, no dropping down on one knee. The proposal felt like a last-minute decision. As if he’d just realized he couldn’t leave me behind. I needed more than that. I wanted to come first, not be an afterthought.
I told him no because I couldn’t leave. I didn’t have a choice, and I thought he understood that. He knew my situation better than anyone. My teachers always commented on what an amazing job my father was doing, but in reality, it was me holding the family together.
I’d hoped Mark would ask me to wait for him. He hadn’t. He’d moved on before the pain of his leaving dissipated. The familiar hurt burst in my chest, reaching every nook and cranny, making it difficult to breathe.
