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I could see the pain echoing within her gaze as she was unzipping my pants. I was hurting her the same way she hurt me, except her pain was sneaking once again into the dark corners of my soul. And that was turning what was supposed to be a night of total relaxation into a mechanical act performed purely to fulfill a task.
Hers — to satisfy my needs.
Mine — to see a punishment through to an end.
My mind was ruled by one thought — betrayal. I had betrayed myself. A mistake that couldn’t repeat itself ever again.
I was looking down on Bea as she was removing my boxers. Fuck, how badly I wanted for her not to have any kind of effect on me and to remain as still as a rock underneath her touch. But each brush of her fingers against my skin was sending something more than need to roam through the pit of my stomach.
Still, I was the sameBrax, and if I could control a whole city, then I could fucking control any unwanted reaction from surfacing.
Only physical!It seemed that night I kept needing to keep repeating things to myself to get them through my head.
They were only the needs of the body... Needs that would be satisfied by her tongue.
I was hard long before she parted her lips to have me and my eyes almost rolled to the back of my head from the first time I found room inside her mouth. But hell would freeze over before I would show her any of that.
I kept a calculated attitude, despite that underneath I was boiling like a water geyser ready to explode.
I could tell that she was new at satisfying anyone like this, and that made things even more alluring.
Her lips were rolling over my length, gaining a steady pace, working on me with an astonishing rhythm.
Fuck, it felt amazing... In fact, so amazing that I was having considerable difficulty to keep my poker face on. But I guess I was a master at that game and my indifference seemed to have reactions in my toy’s behavior. She was losing her rhythm as I was certain panic was taking hold of pretty much any other action.
Maybe it was time for me to be thegood guyand give her a little helping hand.
I needed a little boost first. So after pouring myself a glass of whiskey, I grabbed the back of her head to show her how things needed to be properly done.
It was closer to retribution than a lesson, but who was keeping track of my actions anyway?
I steadied her to withstand my thrusts, each stronger and deeper than the one before, trying to satisfy not only my shaft but also my ego, until I felt her fighting for air. Unwilling to stop, I was trying to drive her to the last limit of endurance until she was forced to push me away.
Hate was oozing through every single one of her pores and I wanted to take advantage of exactly that ravaging feeling. If there was a chance my self-control would fail, then I was assuring myself of total despise on her part.
‘Relax, so you won’t choke,’ I grinned, knowing exactly how humiliated she was feeling.
She wasn’t setting into action a single motion out of love or desire. It was all out of an obligation and that was beginning to show between her gritted teeth. ‘Fuck you!’
Oh, my little toy had quite a temper. But so did I. ‘No, Bea, that would be my job.’ And I wasn’t going to be found slacking at my work. At least not at working her.
I began controlling the movements of her head, again and again, running her lips over my throbbing length as she was arousing every single vein.
My blood was pumping with devastating speed, increasing my groans until I felt my throat vibrating under their power. For a second, it brought me a cruel realization. I had no real escape when it came to the woman kneeling in front of me. But that didn’t mean I couldn’t die trying.
‘Good girl,’ I barked again, proving to both of us that I wasn’t controlling just myself, but also her.
She was just a puppet in my hands, nothing more than sexual need.
Fuck. There I was saying it again in the back of my mind, hoping that it would somehow imprint itself on my brain.
I fought with myself like I was a first-line soldier in my personal war, while the gunpowder exploding beneath my belt line was too intense, weakening my defense. The pleasure was winning my game as I had found myself ruled by primordial needs.
I was fucking close and no matter what I tried doing or thinking about, I couldn’t delay the unavoidable for too long.
Bea might not have had any idea of what she was doing, but she was learning damn fast the path to satisfy me, while she seemed far from finding any kind of personal pleasure in her gestures. And it was exactly as I wanted.Right?
My hand lost the grip it held behind her head, reaching straight to the glass of whiskey which I drained in only two mouthfuls. The rage was there again, surrendering me like the fucking Adams Family cloud and making me toss the small coffee table to the ground along with the crystal whiskey bottle. I need to break something. So it was either that or Bea, even if for her, I didn’t need to use physical force to scatter her to pieces.
