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Suddenly, I was all too aware of where I was heading. My lips couldn’t move against her any longer and my hands slipped back to rest upon her waist, trying to prevent a disaster.
I was exactly that disaster.
‘I need to step outside for a second.’ I didn’t have much more time to excuse myself, just paced toward the balcony, hoping that the cool air of the night would somehow calm me.
I prayed that I will be alone, that she would not follow. But after only a few breaths of air, I could hear her somewhere behind me, ‘Are you ok?’
‘Yes, I just needed a smoke.’ I lit myself a cigarette, trying to ignore her… trying to keep my demons away from her. ‘It’s cold outside; put something on.’ A last attempt to send her away.
‘You’re the one to talk. You’re in a tank top.’
I couldn’t even feel the temperature outside as my own body seemed to be at a boiling point.
‘I guess you’re right, but go and put a blanket on,’ I insisted.
I needed her to go, but she returned much faster than I thought, opening her arms to share the space beneath the cover with me, ‘Come here.’
It was like everything was conspiring against me. I couldn’t stop myself from following her request of seeking shelter in her arms.
I tried everything that was within my power to stop myself, but it was as if the planets were aligned to lure therealme out.
I only managed to leave a hand out to keep my cigarette, in shattered illusions that a few drags could help me also keep my calm.
‘So, what’s wrong?’ She asked with an innocence that was hurting me.Did she really think that I had any escape from my nightmares?
Gathering my strength I tried to tell her something. But words didn’t seem to come to my aid, ‘I don’t know, it’s hard to explain, but it doesn’t have to do with you.’
‘It sure felt like it.’ She caught me red-handed.
‘Ok, it does, but it’s not something that can be put on you... it’s not your fault, in any case... It’s mine. Just promise you won’t push me to talk about it.’
‘No, I won’t. Do you want me to leave?’ How could she even ask that question when my strongest desire was to keep her there as mine after she would get to knowme?
‘No... never!’ My tongue got the best of me. ‘I mean, I hadn’t acted like that because I want you to leave.’ I sneaked my arms beneath the blanket, ‘Although you should do it for your own sake.’ Only, it was too late, I was choosing the road of seduction. ‘Better now?’ I asked clenching my hands on her hips and then tumbling my lips upon hers.
‘Yes,’ she couldn’t help but admit the truth.
‘You’re right. It is better,’ I groaned, picking up from where I had left off earlier in my room. My hands went to explore what lay hidden beneath her shirt, while she was keeping hold of the blanket to cover our indiscretions — not that anyone could see us.
I was finally fulfilling my fantasy for the night, capturing her hardened nipples between my fingers as I was gaining new territory with each one of my moves. Though I want more, so much more that it was scaring me. However, I wasn’t going to test the line I promised her I wouldn’t cross, but there were so many otherlinesto be broken.
Before she could fight back against my actions, I lifted her all the way onto my waist, then whirled both of us around until I could place her on the balcony’s balustrade.
‘What are you doing!?’ I feel her panicking, although I chose to dismiss her question. I needed that exact fear she was showing to know I was in control.
My kisses grew in intensity, needing to take possession of everything that she owned. Her emotions, her fears. And in a twisted way, her love.
My mouth moved on hers like there was no tomorrow, while her pleas were losing themselves down my throat, ‘Let me down from here,’ she begged with her voice ragged by fear. Her desperation did nothing more than push me to further explore the soft skin of her silken breasts.
‘Ferris,’ She was all but crying, still under the impression that her whines could stop me.
‘Shush,’ I drew her mid-waist against my crotch, raising her skirt until her core was at one with my jeans. I felt fully aroused, ready to have her in that second, and equally ready to destroy everything that she meant so I could rebuild her after my own vicious pleasure.
I paused for an instant to explain things more clearly to her, ‘I need you to trust me.’ The adrenaline... the life and death sensations were unmatched. I just hoped she could share my vision.
I made my way under the blanket to close my mouth over her hardened tips while pushing her so far back that she was hanging over the edge of the balcony. Call it madness, but I called it greatness. The intensity of the sensation made everything so much more special.
If it wasn’t for the side section of the deal, I would have had her then and there. I had my ways of convincing her, and no one has ever said no to me before.
