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Maybe I sounded like a madman, but this was making me realize I was still alive, and more than that, to be happy for my own good luck of living so high above the ground.
I finally found myself a seat on an old windpipe to complete the picture, lighting myself a cigarette. ‘This is as amazing as it is deadly,’ I observed as I took the first drag.
‘That thing you just put in your mouth is as deadly as that cloud.’
‘Then I’m just racing towards my death.’ We all were going to end up in the same place sooner or later, even though my angel of death seemed to have abandoned me.
‘Don’t talk like that, Ferris. You have so many things to look forward to.’
‘Name one.’ I wanted to know how she saw things because from where I stood, I didn’t have that many reasons.
‘Helping someone. Not giving them a glass of water kind of help. Like really help a person. Change someone’s life.’
‘I thought I already did that with you.’
‘I didn’t mean me. A random person. Like all the people we’re going to help if we manage to pull this off.’
I knew exactly what she meant. She’s done that before with one of her friends, gifting the girl a diamond bracelet that I paid fifty grand for. And I couldn’t help myself and keep my mouth shut about it, especially since I was afraid she would repeat the overlyempathetic gesture. I knew there wasn’t some trick behind it, but I would have preferred she checked with me first. It would have saved Alfred’s trip to the pawn shop to buy it back.
The subject was quickly dropped since I didn’t want to let it ruin our evening. Besides, I was well able to ruin the evening all by myself, I didn’t need a reason to back me up...
‘I’ll make it up to you,’ she promised, showing me the take-out bag.
Hmmm, 50k worth of chicken. ‘I guess that will do.’ I smiled, watching her take enough chicken wings for three people out of the bag. ‘Where did that come from?’And what happened with the small menu?
‘The extra $2.50 did the trick.’ She began setting the dinner table on the ventilation pipe.
‘I’m starting to think you’re an expert at this.’ There was a slight pain in my voice as I said it. I’ve struggled with many things in my life, but missing the basics like food and clothes were never among them.
‘At romantic diners? Not by a long shot.’ She was being a smart-ass.
‘Getting by with basically nothing. That’s what I was referring to.’
‘Oh... Story of my life,’ the bittersweet tone was making her words that more real.
I had to admit the meal was a-fucking-mazing, despite the possibility of getting dysentery.
Still, the atmosphere was a little tense. Bea had something to tell me. I felt it during our dinner, but she only found the courage to say it after we finished our meals, ‘You know. I don’t want you to think that I don’t appreciate what you do for me.’
I knew what that was about — her friend Jenna. ‘I know you had good intentions. I would have just liked it if you would have told me. Although I haven’t given you too many reasons to trust me.’ Maybe she was entitled not to tell me since I hadn’t been acting too stable lately. ‘You know, I’m also thinking of the harm I’ve caused you. I hope you’ll be able to forgive me. And to ease my way, I did something.’ Well, I never actually did it with that purpose in mind, but it sure came in handy.
‘What?’ She asked unsure if she should be happy or terrified.
‘Do you remember my business trip right before Brax got your family back?’
‘How could I forget?’
I couldn’t forget the show I made her put on that day either. ‘Not very nice of me.’ But it was really nice for me…
‘No, it wasn’t.’ She came down from the windpipe to peer at me — like she could intimidate me in any way.
I was determined to show herintimidation, trapping her between my legs so she could be as close as possible to my heart as I was going to confess mysins. I couldn’t figure out what she was really doing to me, but I was starting to feel warm in places that used to be glacial cold.
‘You were saying something about your business trip.’ She was trying not to get too carried away by me romancing her.
Too bad for her I held all possible weapons to assure me of success. ‘Yeah... It wasn’t exactly a business trip. At least not company business.’ I couldn’t go on since I immediately noticed sadness sprawling across her face. ‘Hey, what happened?’
‘Nothing. I’m peachy.’ Her tone was letting me know I was in trouble for something I had no clue about.
