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Curtis whooped with approval and Lane let out a long, whistling sheeee sound.
“Get him, girl!” my mom said, laughing.
Grandma Bobo just made some heavy breathing sounds, which was decidedly creepy.
When I pulled back, I saw the look on Dean’s face and instantly felt like shit about myself. In my current state, feeling like shit only made me more upset, though. I got up, started to leave, then turned back around and picked up what was left of the wine. I lifted it at Dean and smiled. “I think I’ll take this with me.”
“Pearl,” he said, getting up to follow me.
I walked out of the restaurant area and into the hallway outside, bottle of wine in hand. I’d left my shoes under the table, I realized, but didn’t particularly care.
“What has gotten into you?” Dean asked once we were outside and alone again.
“Let’s see. I told myself I was done letting guys have power over me, because that always leads to me getting hurt. Then, I stupidly went and gave you power over me and what did you do? Surprise! You hurt me with it. So, sorry if I’m feeling a little bitter right now. My sister is about to get married to the guy of her dreams and I’m supposed to pretend to be with the guy who just tore my heart out.”
“Pearl…” Dean’s voice was raspy and soft. “I didn’t want it to go this way.”
“Well, it did, didn’t it? I guess we both just have to deal with the consequences.”
I lifted the wine bottle towards my mouth but Dean tried to stop me. “You really should go easy on that stuff. At least until the dinner is over. People are going to–”
“Let go,” I said, yanking it free. But the motion made wine slop over the top of the bottle and splash all over my dress. I let my arms hang at my side, looking down at the yellow dress I’d just bought that was now spattered with red wine. “There’s wine on my boob,” I said.
Dean sighed and took the bottle from me, setting it on the carpet beside us. “Come on. We should just go back to our room. Nobody will miss us.”
“My sister will notice I’m gone.” Most of the fight was draining out of me. I’d been acting like a child throwing a tantrum and I knew that. I just couldn’t quite make myself stop once I’d started. Maybe acting out and embarrassing myself felt better than dwelling on my reality. Who knew?
“I’ll go in there and make an excuse for you. I can say you aren’t feeling well.”
“I’m supposed to give a speech.”
“Do you think you’re going to give a good speech right now?” Dean asked.
I couldn’t help laughing a little. “Actually, no. I think I might go on a rant about how men suck and we should use their penises to feed the hungry.”
Dean narrowed his eyes. “You want to put penises in hungry people’s mouths? Please don’t ever run for a government office.”
I covered my eyes, letting out a sound somewhere between laughing and crying.
I didn’t want his hands on me, but Dean wrapped me in a hug anyway, and I let him.
“Wait here just a minute. I’ll go and make an excuse for us, then we’ll go to the room. You can continue ignoring me once we’re there.”
“Okay,” I said weakly. Once I was by myself, I could finally feel just how much the wine was getting to me. Little bits and pieces of how I’d acted came drifting back. I wished I could rewind time an hour or so, then knock that stupid bottle out of my hand. I’d been feeling like shit before, but numbing the pain wasn’t worth how much I’d just mortified myself in front of my entire family.
Dean came back a few minutes later. “We’re good. Everybody understands. Come on.”
“You should stay. I’ll just go back on my own. I’m sorry for ruining your night, Dean. I just…”
“Hey,” he said, taking my hands. “Don’t apologize for anything. I deserve all that and more. I get it. But I’m also not letting you go back to our room on your own. Did you forget we’re at Stone Tower? You don’t have keys to my car and you’re not driving. You’re definitely not walking miles back to Fairhope. Not like this, especially.
“Oh, yeah,” I said. “I guess we are far away. You can just drop me off, then. Come back and enjoy the rest of your night.”
“Come on,” Dean said. He put a hand on the small of my back and led me out of the hotel, to the car, and got us on the road.
37
DEAN
I’d seen Pearl tipsy twice now. Actually, both times, I’d been a little tipsy myself and we’d wound up sleeping together. But this was my first time seeing her truly drunk.
