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He isn’t worth it, Aurora.
“Aurora—,” he begins, but I cut him off.
“You know what, I’m done with your bullshit, Father. I don’t even care why you’re calling anymore,” I tell him, preparing to cut the call.
“Not even if it’s about your mother?” he asks and his words stop me short. He has never mentioned the woman who gave birth to me before. The only thing I know about my mother is that she left when I was little. I don’t even remember her face.
“What are you talking about?” I ask, still reeling from the shock.
“Your mother. She’s back, Aurora,” he says.
I feel my resolve crumbling. If I wasn’t sitting, I’m sure I’d lose my balance. It feels like the world has turned upside down and I’m hanging from the ceiling, having a casual phone conversation with a stranger who calls himself my father. My mind swirls in disbelief.
“What do you mean ‘she’s back’?” I blurt. “Where is she? Is she in New York? When did she come back? Where was she anyway?” My words come out rapidly.
“I will answer all your questions, but you can’t tell Lev about our discussion,” he says. My suspicions surge again.
“Why can’t I tell him about my mother?” I ask.
“That is…complicated,” he blurts, seemingly unsure what to say.
“Why is it complicated? Tell me!” I demand. My eyes are now full of tears and I know I’m close to completely losing my patience with him.
“Lev thinks that your mother is dead,” he sighs, probably realizing that he can’t pull my strings any longer. “He can’t know that she’s alive. I can’t have Lev Ivanov think that we are a family of liars. My reputation is on the line.”
“I don’t see why I should care about what Lev thinks of you or your reputation,” I point out. “Besides, why would he think that she’s dead?” Nothing about this whole story adds up. My mother has been gone for most of my life. She abandoned me as a small child. Now she’s back? If she is, why doesn’t she call me instead of my father?
My father’s still talking, though.
“The details are in the past. Unimportant. Just be aware that you have no idea who Lev Ivanov is, Aurora,” he says darkly. “One thing is certain, however. He detests lies. He believes lies to be as bad as betrayal.”
“Let me get this straight,” I mumble, rubbing my eyes. “You’re saying Lev can’t stand a liar yet you expect me to lie to him about going to see my mother? There is no way I can leave the estate without his permission.” Not to mention that if he finds out my mother is alive, there’s no way he’ll believe I wasn’t in on the deception from the start. My father has made me complicit in his crap without me even knowing. Or caring.
“Lying is one thing. Withholding the truth is another. All you have to say is that you’re going out.” He gives a light snort. “I didn’t think I would have to work so hard to convince you to see your mother. I thought you would be happy to hear from her,” he adds and I know he’s getting impatient. Knowing his temperament, I’m surprised that he didn’t flip already.
“Please don’t go this route, Father. Forgive me for being apprehensive about a mother who was never there for me. If I see her, it’s only because I want answers,” I fire back.
“Fine, if this is how you want to do it, no problem. I’ll tell her you aren’t interested in seeing her. But don’t ever ask me about her after today,” he says, and I pause.
Shit.
This is your chance, Aurora.
You know he means it when he says you won’t get another shot at meeting your mother.
As much as I’d like to say yes, the thought of having to lie to Lev doesn’t sit with me well. Even if my father calls it “withholding the truth.” Guilt gnaws at me. I chew on my thumbnail, anxiously pacing the room. But I know I’ll never get a chance to see my mother again unless I do as he says.
“Fine, I’ll do it,” I tell him before I can change my mind.
“Good. You made the right choice. I’ll send you the time and location,” he says.
“Okay,” I reply. When I glance down, I realize I’m clenching my fists.
This is really happening.
I’m going to see my mother.
I wonder what she will be like. What she will think of my situation. I wonder why she left all those years ago, only to return now.
