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As I’m about to do that, the distinctive sound of someone picking up greets me, followed by a serious female, “Hello?”
“Hi. It’s me, Teal. Jane.”
There’s a long silence at the other end of the line, so long that my breathing thickens. I expected this reaction, but ever since Papa laid out her and Knox’s past in front of me, I couldn’t help feeling the need to talk to her.
Maybe I sensed this all along, which is why I memorized her and Elsa’s phone numbers. We exchanged them that one time we met, and Elsa might have forced Teal to do it. Before I changed phone numbers, Elsa used to send me good mornings and hellos and we chatted sometimes, but this is my first contact with Teal.
“This isn’t your number,” she says finally.
“I changed it.”
“Okay.”
I gulp again. If there’s one thing I’ve noticed about Teal, it’s her no-nonsense personality, so she’d expect me to get to the point soon.
“Listen, Teal…I…I’m sorry.”
“About what?”
“Everything.”
“He told you?” There’s a tiny softness in her voice.
“Not exactly…”
“I knew he would.”
“You did?”
“Yeah. He looks at you differently. Almost like the way Ronan looks at me, and let’s just say I never expected to see that expression on my aimless brother’s face.”
“Teal…”
“So, what now? You feel sorry for us?”
“No. Of course…I…understand, or I hope I do. My childhood wasn’t a colorful one either since I was raised by an abusive father.” I pause, then blurt, “That doesn’t mean that I’m downplaying what you went through. I know it’s much more serious, and you guys are way more stronger than me. I called my biological father for help, but you found it on your own, and I guess what I’m trying to say is that I respect that. So much.”
There’s a pause before she says in a less defensive tone, “So you don’t pity us?”
“Absolutely not. I just…just want to hug him and you…and I’m not much of a hugger. Besides, I have a feeling you’re not either. But yeah, I don’t pity you.”
“Good, because I wouldn’t let anyone make my brother feel less than what he is. He deserves better.” Her voice lowers, and I think it breaks when she says, “He deserves the world for how he stood up for both of us.”
“I know.”
“No, you don’t know. And even if you did, it’s only his side of the story in which he must’ve made his role seem miniscule.”
“There’s another side?”
“Yes. Mine. What happened to us back then was…bad. It was so bad that we both consider it our lives’ black holes. But I was able to escape it at a younger age. Knox hasn’t. He buried it inside and thought it would magically heal, which is never the case. If anything, it will fester and become worse as the years go by. But do you know when the first time he allowed himself to be open, even a little, was? It was with you, and I could feel it, even if he doesn’t talk about it, even if he still considers himself my protector and wants to shield me from pain. I know I haven’t really been welcoming of you, but it takes me some time to warm up to people, so if you want, if you can, maybe we can meet sometimes?”
“I’m sorry, Teal.” My voice is brittle, wrong.
“Whatever for?”
“I don’t think it’s possible anymore. He and I…we belong to different worlds.”
“I thought that, too, when I first met my husband, but he’s the most precious gift I’ve ever received.”
