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And neither will I.
I’msorry you loved me.
Daniel
32
DANIEL
My fixation with Nicole started the day she nearly died in my arms.
She was the weirdest fucking little shit I’ve ever met, and that says something considering I used to think of her as an “I’m better than you and your grandma” kind of snob.
At school, she was prim and proper. Always smiling, always looking down her nose at the peasants who dared to be in her vicinity.
Always…far.
But that day, she was herself. A thief, a sneak, and someone who liked to hide.
That day was the first time I actually met her.
Strange, outspoken, and generous despite her weakness. She gave me her precious snow globe. I know because she sometimes brought it with her to school and stared at it when no one was looking as if it was a part of her.
But then she decided to give me that part of her.
She gave me the snow globe and the girl trapped inside it. That girl takes her shape in my head whenever I stare at that snow globe.
It’s a reminder of the little girl who smiled up at me with pure awe and adoration while she was slowly dying.
But her manipulative side ruined it all afterward. Or maybe it was my fragile pride that couldn’t take the idea of being wounded by her disinterest over and over again.
I felt played.
Stomped upon.
And the first thing I had in mind is taking revenge. I wanted her to suffer as much as I did, but I had no effective method for that aside from ignoring her.
In doing that, I had hoped I’d manage to move past her intrusive eyes, her unmatched beauty, and addictive presence.
I had hoped wrong.
Nicole is the only woman I wanted with the same force that I hated her with. And if I weren’t kidding myself, I would call it more than wanting her.
So much more.
However, she existed in another world than mine, like a queen. You can look at her on her throne, you can reach close, but you can never touch her.
She was also a bitch, not only to me but to everyone. She wore her mean girl persona as a crown and made sure everyone saw her adjusting it over those blonde locks.
No one had access to the Nicole that lurked within, not even her mother, her stepfather.
No one.
I got close once, so close that I kissed her and unleashed all the desire I’ve been suppressing for years.
But it was soon gone. Soon dissipated.
Then I thought she cheated on me. Don’t judge—my dick-oriented brain categorized it as such since I didn’t fuck anyone after her. I even went through all the trouble of making everyone—Astrid included—believe that I shagged something other than my hand so they wouldn’t think I was broken.
