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Grabbing my waist, he heaves me up and onto his desk and stands, backing away from me. Confused, I look at him, trying to look him in the eyes, all the while he avoids my face.
“Cole. What are you doing? Let’s talk about this, let’s go somewhere and hide away and really talk about this.”
“No. Foster will be here in five minutes, pack what you need and go with him. I can’t do this. I won’t.”
Time literally feels like it’s stopping. “What are you talking about? You are what, exactly? Sending me away? Breaking up with me?” I yell as I jump off the desk and walk to get in his face.
“I just need you safe, Mia, you don’t need this shit.
None of it! It was my fault we went to the party in the first place. I’m the one who wanted to keep the wedding private because of a business deal that I wanted to close before my announcement. I was being a selfish ass and I ruined your whole life. And now, now I know that because of me, you almost took your life, too!” His voiced is laced with frantic energy and he wipes his hand through his hair with a look of panic. My instinct is to make him happy, to calm him. I can do that for him. I can give that to him, even if it breaks my heart. I mean we just started…
“Okay. You’re right, I’ll go. Please Cole, please just calm down. You don’t need this stress. Will you call me later?”
“Yes,” he breaths out, taking a long breath in. “I just need to know that I can make it all clean for you. I don’t ever want you to hate your life so much that you wouldn’t value it.”
If ever I had an opportunity to make him understand, now was it. Slowly, I walk over to him, taking his hands and staring into his eyes. This was my home and I’ll be damned if his fear would cause us to separate.
Considering my words carefully, I begin. “The day I did it was particularly difficult. I was struggling with just assimilating back into my life. School was a disaster and graduation seemingly grim. My days seemed to run together and I had been tuning people out for months. The depression was evident, but being inside was different. I didn’t see the sorrow, I just welcomed the silence. I was so tired of talking about it, so tired of hearing the sympathy in everyone’s voices. Everyone just seemed to look at me with pitiful eyes and I honestly just felt like I would never be able to feel what it was like for someone to really see me again. Likeme, thereal me, deep inside. I was afraid I’d never be seen again. It felt worse than what I considered death would be like, so I took a handful of pills, immediately panicked and puked, called Alex… and lived. Even after all of it, I wasn’t truly alive until a year later, until you looked at me again. I’m only alive because of you, Cole, please don’t make me go back to living without you.”
He just stands, looking into my eyes, looking into my soul.
“You aren’t crying,” he cocks his head to the side as if he’s trying to figure me out.
“Nope, because I’m not fragile, so long as I’m with you,” I grin up at him.
“That sounds very anti-feminist,” he says.God, I love that sideways grin.
“I know how much power I have, I know I could make it through anything alone, but together… Cole, together, we are limitless. I’m truly frightened by the depth of my love for you, but I’m more afraid to live without it.”
“Mia.” His lips move in a whisper as he pulls me into his arms. We stay like that for what seems like eons while he whispers regrets and wishes into my lips, my neck and any other part of me he can kiss. I listen and accept it all, giving back as much as I get. This is our real moment, the moment of our commitment to each other. Absolutely no man can, or will, ever put asunder. Cole and I commit in that room to never separate. As crazy as is seems, amid all the dramatic situations surrounding us, we found our path.
Pulling us from our bubble is the constant buzzing from Cole’s phone. Looking down, he tips his head to the side and puts the phone to his ear, never letting go of me.
“Foster, plans have changed. I will be with Mia. Let’s plan for the cottage. We will pack and meet you in a half hour. Inform the shark pool and I will handle the rest.”
Without a goodbye, he ends the call and kisses the top of my head and I squeeze his waist harder.
“Cottage?” I ask, looking up at him.
“Surprise,” he laughs. “My plan was to take you there Friday night before everything happened. I bought you a present.” His eyes twinkle with delight.
“Wait, when? You bought me a cottage? When were you going to tell me this news?” I ask in disbelief, pulling back to look at Cole’s face.
“If you were listening, you would have heard me say that I was planning on surprising you last night. I was going to take you for the weekend, but then I got sidetracked with being arrested for murder and all.” Grinning, he grabs my hands and kisses them.
I start to bounce a little and without being able to control myself, I squeal.
“This is the best present ever! Where is it? What should I pack?” I lurch myself forward and plant a huge kiss on his lips and wrap my arms around his neck.
“I’d buy you a million houses if they make you this happy.”
“I love you, Cole Parker.”
“Right back atcha, Mrs. Parker.”
Taking my hand, Cole leads us back to the bedroom to pack. I walk into my closet and grab my luggage and begin searching for all the perfect cottage outfits. After shaking his head for the millionth time at my two bags, he sandwiches his small bag in between mine and picks all of them up without struggle, leaving his free hand to wrap around my waist.
Foster meets us on the bottom floor and takes the bags from Cole. They exchange some words while I text Alex to tell her I will be out of town.
