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She belongs to you now. The thought crashes through my mind. A deep longing takes hold. I want that to be true. I feel protective of her. I know what I did in the shower was wrong. I don’t know what came over me, but I had to touch her. She makes me feel alive again. As if I’ve been numb and she’s brought me back to life.
The need to have her come undone in my arms clawed at me like nothing ever had in my life. I wanted to make her feel good. I wanted her to become addicted to me and all the things I could do for her so she’d never want to leave. I saw the need in her and I wanted to please her.
But when I laid her down on my bed, guilt rode me hard. Or I thought that was what it was, but the more I thought on it the more I think I felt guilty about not feeling guilty. If that even makes any fucking sense.
Her hands go to my chest, her fingers digging into my shirt. For once I wish I didn't have my shirt on, which hasn't been normal for me since I got my scars. I wanted her hands on my bare skin. To feel the warmth of her.
When she said she thought she should go I’d almost lost it. My razor-thin control almost snapped. If some of the men in my squadron could see me now. They used to call me Mr. Control. Now I have none when it comes to her. She shattered it the minute I saw her lying in the snow. I knew in that moment my life was about to change.
“I wanted you.” Her words are low. Almost a whisper. I tilt her head up, wanting to have her eyes on me. Eyes like nothing I’ve seen before. The deepest green I’ve ever seen. Such a contrast with her rich black hair and porcelain skin.
“Wanted?” I ask. Has something changed?
“Want,” she admits. I watch pink deepen on her cheeks. The sight makes my dick leak cum. I’ve been so fucking hard. Even after I came all over myself in the shower when she orgasmed for me. The water thankfully covered the evidence of my cum. I came like a teenager watching his first porno. It was almost embarrassing.
I haven’t had any interest in sex since before that bomb blew the hell out of me. I haven’t even taken myself into my own hand. There hasn’t been a drive. My focus has been on this town, cleaning up the mess the last sheriff left behind, taking care of my ma. All of those feelings and needs are now crashing down on me and driving me to her.
I suck in a breath.
“You’re so young,” I tell her. She’s barely eighteen. She has the whole world in front of her. But I’ve seen the world. So has she. It’s not all pretty. Monsters wait in the dark.
She needs you.
The thought pounds in my head. She’s already seen too much harshness and cruelty. She’s so small and innocent. I could shield her from it all. Take care of her.
“Do you not want me anymore?” I can see the vulnerability written on her face as she says the words.
“More than my next breath,” I admit easily, wanting to take the look off her face. I don’t ever want her to question the need and want I have for her. I want her to know I’ll always be here for whatever she might need. She’ll never find herself out in the snow all alone again with nowhere to go. Not as long as I breathe.
“Even after what Coach Snow told you? About me—”
I growl, cutting off her words. She widens her eyes. I want to tell her to fuck what Coach Snow has to say. I’ll be having a talk with the principal about her in the very near future. I knew she only used my Catherine as a reason to call me. We weren't two minutes into the call and she was edging for a fucking date. She never should have been the one to call me in the first place. She should have reported concerns to the principal, then he would have reached out to me if need be.
I don't like the thought of anyone using my Catherine. It pisses me off. It didn't help when I walked into the living room and saw Catherine gearing up to leave. I’m sure the look on my face scared her. I never want her to fear me in any way. I want her to run to me, not from me.
“Coach Snow only made it clearer to me that you need someone to look after you. To take care of you. I'm going to be that someone. I want you, Catherine. I want you more than I’ve ever wanted anything.”
