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My hands reach up between us and try to shove him back again, but he just drags me closer, his body fitting against mine exactly how I had hoped to forget.
Asher's fingers curl into my hair, grabbing the back of my head as my fingers fumble with his jacket buttons. I unbutton it, shoving it off his shoulders onto the floor. I feel his hand grab the zipper of my dress, pulling it down as we kiss.
The dress falls to a heap on the floor, Asher's hand travelling down my bare back to grab my ass. My hands find the first button on his shirt and I play with it for too long, that I rip the shirt open in frustration. The almost non-existent sounds of buttons hitting the floor don't faze us, and I reach for his pants as he throws off the ruined shirt.
I pull his belt off, flinging across the room as I undo his pants. Asher finally breaks away from the kiss, his lips immediately finding my neck as his hands unclasp my bra.
Shoving down his pants, I drop my arms, letting the bra fall on top of the dress. Asher loops an arm around me again, lifting me up and throws me onto the bed. I glare at him, enraged as he quickly kicks off his pants. He puts his knee on the bed, leaning over me. He grabs my throat, shoving my head back into the soft mattress as he hovers over me.
Without breaking his hold on my neck, he leans down, kissing me heatedly. I return the kiss, my nails gripping his back painfully. I dig them in, dragging them down his back.
Asher growls, his hand letting go of my throat to grab my breast. I loudly inhale a breath of air, which turns into a moan as his mouth descends on my nipple. His tongue flicks the pink tip as he drops his hand to my underwear. He caresses me through the flimsy material, and when I dig my nails into his shoulders again, he pulls them roughly to the side, his finger pushing between my slit.
I'm already soaking, and I hate myself for it. Phoebe's right – we're toxic. But we're an oh-so beautiful fucking mess.
His finger slides inside of me, pumping in and out as he kisses my neck. His teeth pull my skin between them, before he sucks on my neck, marking me. He's a mad man possessed, determined to remind me of his touch and prove a point to the fucking world.
Asher reaches down, pulling off his brief trunks before reaching for my underwear. In one swift movement, he tears them off my body, throwing the ruined piece on top of his equally mutilated shirt.
I reach up, threading my hands through his hair. I bundle the soft strands in my hand, pulling them roughly. Asher growls, reaching for my hand and shoving it against the mattress next to my head.
He forces my legs apart with his knee, his hand curling around my thigh. Without warning, he plunges into me, filling me with his cock.
My mouth falls open as my head tips back. He starts a quick, brutal pace, the two of us fuelled by toxicity and some fucked up version of love.
The bed bangs against the wall with the power of his thrusts, my body inching up the bed with each movement as I take him over and over. My nails find his back again as our mouths collide almost painfully. I feel wetness under my fingertips, and I know I've drawn blood, but neither of us care.
Asher captures my moans as he relentlessly fucks me, harder than I've ever been fucked before. But I don't care. I'm lost, falling down the cliff with him. And it feels so good.
His hand slips between us, finding my clit. He rubs it, his fingers sending me into a frenzy. Without warning my orgasm rips through me, my back arching as I cry out into his kiss.
"Fuck, you feel so good squeezing my cock. You take my cock so well it's like you were made for it," he growls beneath thrusts.
He pulls out suddenly, grabbing my arm and leg, and flipping me onto my stomach. He re-enters me, his hand grabbing my lightly curled hair and ripping my head back.
My hands clench the duvet underneath me, as I feel his cock slam into me. He pulls my hair tighter, my neck wrenching back as he impales me deeper. He lets out a low groan, cursing under his breath as he stills, releasing himself into me.
The two of us are left a panting, sweaty mess as Asher pulls out of me, falling onto the bed beside me. I turn onto my side to face him.
Asher leans forward, kissing me gently. I kiss him back, this time with less force.
"This still doesn't change anything," I murmur.
"I know," he replies, stroking the hair above my temple.
We lay on the bed for awhile, just staring at each other, the sounds of the wedding still audible in the distance. We don't say anything, just enjoying the brief moment before we go back to reality. Because no matter how much Asher tries, I'll never bring myself to forgive him for what he did to me.
There's a fine line between love and hate, and right now, I'm straddling it.
And I fully intend on keeping one leg on the hate side.
Chapter nineteen
Iwakeupthenext morning, feeling hungover. I'm tangled in the blankets, my whole body aching as I groan and do my best to find where my limbs start and the duvet ends.
An arm slips around my waist, stilling me.
My eyes shoot open as my head snaps towards the body next to me. Asher is watching me lazily, his eyes monitoring my expression as I become conscious again.
