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But yet, somehow, here I am. At an ice-skating rink. With my significant other.
Although, thebeing with my significant otherpart isn’t so bad. Blair and I became official just yesterday. She had been pretty adamant during our late-night phone call about determining what our label was. She said she wouldn’t be satisfied if she didn’t know. She told me she hates the idea of me being with other people, and that she isn’t seeing anyone besides me.
While I hadn’t realized I would be getting into another relationship so soon, everything about being with Blair feels right. It doesn’t feel rushed or like I am stepping in the wrong direction. If anything, I feel like I’m becoming the best version of myself that I’ve ever been. And it’s all because of her.
“Okay, I didn’t wanna tell you this because I was pretty positive I’d find some way to get out of doing it,” I begin to say to Blair. We’re holding hands and standing outside the rink, watching all of the skaters move around, some of them graceful, some of them making it look easy, and some of them falling on their asses. “But I’ve never actually done this before.”
Blair’s beautiful eyes stare back at me in wide surprise. But how could she be surprised?
“Do I really look like the type of person who does this kind of stuff?” I say in my defense.
She giggles. “Well, then… I’ll just have to teach you!” Her eyes twinkle with amusement.
I smirk at her and brush my nose against hers affectionately. “I guess you will,” I reply. “You better not let me fall, or I’m taking you down with me.”
She giggles and takes my hand, and then drags me along to purchase the skate rentals. Then when we’re all laced up and ready to go, we head over to the edge.
“Have you at least been rollerblading?” she asks.
“Well, yeah, of course. That’smuchmore my style.”
“Good, because it’s similar to that. I’m sure you’ll be fine.”
I take her hand anyway, feeling deathly terrified as we step out onto the ice. It’s so cold and hard… how do people not crack their heads open on it? The thought of it makes me shutter.
We don’t even make it very far before I slip in my skates and tumble down. And just as promised, Blair falls with me. I hadn’t even meant to do it, but I do weigh a lot more than her.
“Maybe—we should have—brought some protective gear,” Blair says to me through her gasps of pain. I nod in agreement, and we get ourselves back to our feet. Then we look at each other and burst out laughing.
We spend the next half hour barely moving away from the edge of the rink as Blair continues to try to teach me. In my opinion, it’s nothing like rollerblading. And I’m never going to get good at it. But it’s cute how determined Blair is. She’s like this with anything she does. It’s refreshing that when she puts her mind to something, she achieves it. I never actually thought that was possible.
Later, I get to the point where we manage to somehow make it one entire lap around the ring without falling or gripping onto the walls. I probably could’ve gone even further, too, but the person standing on the edge of the rink outside makes me stop abruptly. Then Blair slams into my back as she skates behind me, and the two of us slide into the wall nearby, my eyes never leaving the person I’m seeing.
She is exactly the same as the last time I saw her. Long dark hair. Piercing gaze. An unapproachable expression in her eyes. Her brows thick and dark, and her skin tan despite the cloudy and cold weather outside.
It’s Jennifer.
“Dam?” Blair asks beside me. “Are you okay? Why did you stop?”
In front of me, Jennifer crosses her skinny little arms and puts her weight on one hip. Then, raising an eyebrow, she says, “Wow, Damascus. I didn’t know you liked to ice skate.” Her voice is judgmental and brutal. Heart-stoppingly, painstakingly brutal.
And damn, she’s more beautiful than ever.
“Jennifer,” is all I can manage to say, my lungs out of breath, but not from ice-skating. I’m too afraid to even look at the expression on Blair’s face. She shouldn’t have to see this.
Jennifer offers me a simple smile. One that doesn’t reach her eyes. “It’s good to see you. Been a while.”
It seems as if all the pain she’s caused me since she dumped me has come flooding back into my chest. I feel defenseless and heartbroken all over again.
There shouldn’t be cheery happy Christmas music playing on the speakers around us right now. There should be a doom song playing. Like I’m about to battle a boss in a video game.
“Uh, yeah. Ithasbeen a while.” I make sure not to say that it’s good to see her, too, because it’s definitely not. No matter how much my heart disagrees with me. I’m going to be strong and listen to my head and my stomach.
“Oh!” I take Blair’s hand beside me and pull her closer. “This is my girlfriend, Blair. Blair, this is my ex, Jennifer.”
Jennifer’s eyes widen for the briefest moment, but then she looks at Blair. “Nice to meet you,” she says cordially.
I hope I am hurting her. I hope it physically causes her pain to know that I’ve already moved on. To know that I don’t need her.
