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He raised his hands in retreat. “My bad, man.”
“Besides, that’s not exactly it. Something doesn’t sit right with me.”
“Like what?”
“It’s just strange.” I shook my head. “She isn’t anything like I was told. And there’s not a single scar on her neck from the crash—nothing to explain a permanent loss of voice. Maybe it sounds crazy, but I feel like I’m missing something.”
“See what you can dig up. Better now than later, once you’re stuck with her.”
I grunted. I’d already decided it was time to do some research, but not because I was considering backing out. I’d made Jimmy a promise, and I always kept my word. And I wouldn’t be choosing another woman because somewhere in the past few days, I’d decided that Noemi was meant for me.
Maybe it was too many years of listening to the old guys blather on about fate. I didn’t buy into that bullshit, but I also didn’t know how else to explain this strange compulsion growing inside me. An instinctual attraction that had my thoughts and desires locked on one woman. Nothing else distracted from my singular need for Noemi Mancini. She was mine, and I was going to prove it to her.
He wantedto have sex with me. Marriage was one thing; sex was entirely different. Intimacy came with vulnerability and trust—things that would bring emotion into the mix. The last thing I wanted was to develop feelings for Conner Reid. Being married to the man was bad enough. If I cared for him too, my heart would never survive.
Men like him—like my father—didn’t love. Not the way I wanted to be loved.
I wanted a man who put his wife and children first. I wanted devotion and commitment. Conner would never give me that, and falling for him would only make the disappointment more painful.
During the next four days, I concentrated on erecting sturdy walls around my heart and guarding myself against his alluring good looks. I knew he’d use them to chip away at my resolve, but I couldn’t let him succeed.
I spent a ridiculous amount of time debating my outfit for the night and ended up selecting a dress that was sexier than I’d previously worn. I also decided not to examine my reasons for said selection too closely. Sometimes a girl needed to look especially hot. It was a confidence boost.
That was my story, and I was sticking to it.
I curled my hair into soft waves and dipped into my makeup bag a little deeper than my usual daily routine. To top things off, I dug through my mother’s jewelry box and put on her favorite necklace. The small white gold bell had been her mother’s before her. Wearing it made me feel close to her. It was the cherry on my confidence sundae.
When my father saw my choice of jewelry, lightning flashed behind his obsidian eyes, promising retaliation should I step out of line. The rest of my family had a far different reaction. Pippa and her mother instantly teared up and wrapped me in a hug.
Aunt Etta and my mom were fraternal twins and had been incredibly close. When the two had baby girls only weeks apart, it had been natural that Pip and I became like sisters ourselves. She had two younger sisters and a brother, but I was never quite as close with any of them. That was why our separation over the past six months had been extra difficult. I’d only been allowed a few supervised visits, which meant I never had the chance to tell her the truth. Not that I would have. It was almost a blessing that Dad had kept us apart because she was the one person who would have unearthed my secrets. She would have made me talk. Literally.
In the early days, I’d debated endlessly about fessing up to her, but it was too dangerous. She was horrible with secrets. I couldn’t take that chance.
Seeing her now, an avalanche of words careened into my throat, demanding to be released. Not just that, but a swell of emotions overtook me. I’d been so damn lonely at my house. The relief of finally seeing her again after only a couple of visits in months made my chest ache.
I fought back the onslaught. I couldn’t fall apart now.
“You look incredible, Em,” Pip whispered before pulling back and beaming at me with glassy eyes.
“Just like Nora,” Aunt Etta added in an emotion-filled rasp.
I shook my head and hugged them again before motioning to the back room we’d reserved. When we entered, my heart fluttered at the sight of my family. Pip and her dad, my uncle Gino, along with my mother’s brother, Uncle Agostino, boss of the Moretti crime family, and his wife, Aunt Azzurra. This was the first time since Mom’s death that I’d been allowed anywhere near my uncle for fear I’d tell him what I knew.
If I did, my father would be a dead man.
It would be an easy solution if my father hadn’t been holding my brother as collateral, using him against me. Like tonight. Dad had made up an excuse to keep Sante away. I’d seen the surprise in people’s eyes when Dad explained Sante couldn’t join us. They wondered what could possibly have kept him away from such an important evening, but they wouldn’t disrespect my father by asking.
I could have told. It would only take a second to blurt the words that would take down my father. But what about my brother? Would the Donatis be able to save him from my father’s goons? Maybe. Maybe not. I couldn’t take the chance.
An opportunity would come. I just had to be patient.
Everyone greeted me with warm smiles and detectable pity in their eyes. I wasn’t sure what my father had told everyone to explain away my absence at family functions, but it clearly hadn’t been good.
Once I’d made the rounds, I turned toward the Irish half of the room. The two groups had stayed neatly segregated—a business alliance didn’t mean anyone would be vacationing together anytime soon. The second my gaze turned to their group, Conner’s eyes were on me. Like he’d been waiting. And I knew why when I saw memories reflected in his eyes of my lips wrapped around my finger.
Heat blazed across my cheeks.
A small but victorious smile carved through his dark stubble as he closed the distance between us. “You look mouth-watering tonight,” he murmured once he reached me, laying his hand on the small of my back.
