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It isn't an admission that I'm right, but at least it's something. "I love you too."
We hold hands as we walk back to our camp. His shoulders are still curved, his face still full of pain and loss, but he holds my hand tightly, and I know that means he hasn't given up yet. Even if he doesn't want to admit it out loud.
Onyx is waiting with food when we return. He smiles softly and hands me a plate. Since becoming his mate, so much has changed between us. The wall he was so good at erecting between us has fallen away. It's as if he's finally realized I'm the one person who will never willingly leave him now. That it's okay for us to love and care for one another. Which has allowed me to learn more about him. I've realized that Onyx is the quiet one, and not just because he signs. He's just a quiet man and probably was before losing his hearing too. He's softer than Dusk when he needs to be. Angry when he has to be. Sweet when he’s walking with me outside the cave under the Earth’s moon. Onyx is simply complicated and wonderful.
When we get Phantom back, I know this relationship between all of us will be beautiful. It will be everything I ever wanted in life and more.
At least in my mind.
We eat together around the dying fire. The food tastes like nothing, but that’s how it’s been since Phantom left. I eat because I have to. Not because it brings me any joy. I also eat because the less I fight eating and sleeping, the more my men seem to relax, and I want them to relax. I don’t want them to have to worry about me on top of everything else.
"We're checking again today, then going to cave three, right?" Rayne asks, speaking slowly to make it easier for Onyx to read his words.
Dusk nods. "A quick check. Something about tonight... feels off."
Does it?I sit up a little straighter but feel nothing.
"Agreed," Onyx signs, then returns to eating.
Does he feel it too then?I want to ask, but don't. I'm not sure I want to know. This place is already creepy enough at night, I don't need a reason to be more afraid.
I finish dinner first, but Onyx is the one who cleans up. He tries his best to hide all traces that we'd camped there this day. And then we’re off into the fading light of the evening.
We head to the Void and I have to slow my pace so as not to run to the Void. Every day is another chance to see him. To hope he's found his way back to us.
To be together again and fill the empty space in my heart.
We arrive at the Void together, but as always, we linger in the shadows of the woods. This might be the place Phantom can return to us through, but it's also the place our enemies can come through. And we all know it.
The rays of evening fade away as time passes and darkness swallows us. A wave falls over the forest, and the sound of crickets and night birds fills the air, but we all remain frozen, waiting. Each night we stand here around the Void, watching it as long as our hearts can take it, waiting. I've noticed the others seem to be wanting to leave earlier and earlier each night, but I don't want that. That feels like a step toward giving up our Phantom.
And that’s something I’ll never do.
As if my thoughts have power,heappears.Phantom.
My heart bursts with longing and emotion I don’t know what to do with because as happy as I am to see him, there are differences in him that I can’t deny. He’s dressed all in black, head to toe, like the shadow king himself. He wears a dark cloak on his broad shoulders, and his gaze is sharp and cold as it runs over the woods all around us, as if he's searching for something he despises.
I want to go to him, but even I can see the danger in it. As much as every muscle in my body is aching to run to him, I wait. And watch. We all do. Searching for any sign that this is our Phantom. That there is something left inside of him outside of what the shard has done.
But there's no sign, just that cold look on his face. Just the strangest sense that this man is dangerous and different than the Phantom I love.
Oh God. Is he truly lost to us?This is worse than having him taken from me. This is the kind of aching pain I don’t know what to do with. I’m tired. I’m angry. And now my heart is broken.
But maybe I'm wrong.
The shard in his chest brightens beneath his dark clothes, illuminating his chest in a way that might have been beautiful at any other time. Instead, it's chilling.
If I ever get close enough, I’m going to yank it out and crush it in my hand. I'm going to destroy every last trace of it so that it can never hurt him again.
Phantom moves away from the Void, slowly, circling as if testing something I don't understand. And I watch him, my heart in my throat. If he gets far enough away from the Void, we'll jump on him. We'll bind him up and tear that shard out of him.
I look at the others.
Onyx gives me a subtle nod, and I feel relief flow through me. We're still all on the same page. Even though he isn't the Phantom we remember, they're still with me. They still want to try to save him.
But the closer Phantom comes to me, the brighter the light from the shard is. And I realize after a few moments that that's what he was testing. To see if we were there. To figure out what direction I'm in. And I don't know if I should be happy or afraid.
He nearly reaches the edge of the clearing. His gaze moves up and connects with mine, even though I'm not entirely sure he can see me. And yet, the look in his eyes... it frightens me.
