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I look at Rayne from little slits that are my eyes. I know him like I know myself. But my feelings are all over the place. One part of me wishes my shadow beasts would come back right now, but another part needs a minute to get my head together. And the one thing I don’t do when Onyx, Phantom, and Dusk are around is think clearly.
“Rayne?” I hold out my hand because as confused as I am, Rayne’s presence is a balm to my soul. He comes to lie beside me, and as much as I want to fall into him, I fall asleep instead. It isn’t until a voice wakes me that I realize how tired I was, how hung over all these emotions make me.
Flame, one of the other shadow beasts who was involved in the battle and is still healing—slowly—from his injuries, is standing over me. “Ann, the men will be taking turns guarding you throughout the night. The shadow king won’t be strong enough to attack again right away, but it’s a valuable thing to have you here and now he knows it.” He gazes at me for a long moment, something unreadable in his eyes, then steps back out of the cave.
“A valuable thing,” Rayne mimics after he’s gone, and I can feel tension singing through every inch of his body. This is hard for him, which I’m well aware of, but there are things I can’t control. Like the shadow beasts’ response to me. “You’re valuable to everyone here, I guess,” he adds, and he sounds angry.
I sigh, not feeling ready for a verbal battle already, but I can’t help but ask, “What’s that mean?”
“It means you seem to be really popular here.” He’s taking that tone. It’s accusation and jealousy and anger all rolled into one.
“You died. I mourned. I cried. I had to get through it.” Our voices are raised, and I stare at him like his leaving was a choice.
“Every one of them just seems to look at you like you’re theirs,” he says, his words edged with frustration.
“They’re desperate. They’re lost. Can you really blame them for being excited when some random woman comes, kills a smoke dragon, and helps them win a battle?” He has to see that this is more than just that a bunch of lonely men who want a piece of me. It’s about survival. It’s about these people needingsomethinggood in their lives.
After a minute, his anger dies away. "I know. Sorry. I didn't mean it like that." He shakes his head. “I’m being such an ass, about everything. I know I am. I’m trying. There’s just no way a man can prepare to die, come back, and have to share the woman he loves. It’s… a lot.”
My heart melts a little at the lost look on his face. "I can't imagine this is easy for you either."
“Ann…” He stares back, his eyes soft with hurt and disappointment. “It’s hard to be here, to see how you are with them.” He sighs and shakes his head. He’s building up to whatever he wants to say. “I can share you with them. It’s going to be hard, but I can.” The sincerity in his tone, in his eyes, in his everything… He means it as much as he can and he will try because that’s who he is.
Share me? Rayne?"Are you sure?" My voice is filled with disbelief.
He can’t be. This man… he’s never been the type to shareanything. What’s more, he doesn’t seem to like my shadow beasts, or believe in their war.What’s compelled him to go from running from here with me to giving me his permission to link myself to them forever?
“Yes. I can’t lose you to them, but I also can’t destroy what’s between you. Because I can see you have feelings for them just as much as you love me.” His voice is so earnest, so honest my stomach aches and all the love I feel for him vibrates through me.
Blinking away tears, I say, “Do you think this is where we were meant to end up?”
When my men took me, it felt like my life had been completely derailed. But since our connection has grown and Rayne has returned, it kind of feels like I’m on the path I was always supposed to be on. Which is weird. I just wonder if he feels the same way.
His gaze grows distant. “I don’t know. But I do think we’re here for a reason. And as hard as it is for me to believe that that… Void could swallow all of earth, that there’s a danger the fae aren’t aware of, I don’t think these men are lying. And, certainly, seeing that king and his dragon means trouble. I can’t imagine what would happen if they could walk the earth freely.”
“So you believe the prophecy?” I ask him, really needing to know the answer. Because hearing that I could save the world seems more than a little unbelievable to me.
He shrugs. “I don’t know. Buttheybelieve it, and sometimes beliefis more important than reality. Men and women can do incredible things when their faith in an ideal is strong enough.”
So, he’s like me. He doesn’t know if it’s true, but he knows it’s important. Which is a vast improvement to when he first came here in Adrik’s body.
He gives me another small smile. “So, I guess I’ll be sharing you with those three assholes. But they better treat you well, or they’re going to have me to deal with.”
I tangle my finger into his hair and force him to look at me. “Rayne.” I don’t have more to say. Only that.
His eyes, his, not Adrik’s, are kind, loving.
He smiles. "You know all I've ever wanted is to make you happy."
"Well, having all of you working together and not competing with each other is definitely the right step if you want me to be happy."
He kisses me lightly. "Better tell them before I have anaccidentand end up at the bottom of a cliff."
Laughing, I shove him a little. "They're not going to murder you."
"You sure?" He flashes me that familiar grin of his.
I want to throw myself against him, thank him because a weight has lifted off me. Because I’ve realized that this is what I needed. I needed the mate from my past to say it's okay to love my shadow beasts and that by doing so I'm not betraying him. Even though I didn’t realize it until now.
