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What? No. Is that what I said? My heart is pounding so hard I can’t think straight. “That’s not what I meant.”
“Do you have any idea how humiliating this is? Youliedto me, Desmond. You texted me pretty words, let me tell you about how long it’s been since I’ve been on a date and how long it’s been since I’ve had sex, and then you looked me in the eyes and asked me where I wanted to put my new kitchen, and oh, by the way, remember that rent is due next week. What the fuck?”
“I never reminded you about the rent.”
“How could I forget about it, when you are who you are?” She spits the words at me like they’re venom.
“It wasn’t like that.” I shove my hand in my hair, desperate to make her understand. She needs to know that she’s special, that from the first moment I saw her—
But how could someone like me ever deserve someone like her? I’ve been on the outside since I was eleven years old. I never belonged to my family, never found my place in my hometown. Even now, with the only woman who’s interested me in years, I only manage to push her away.
My claim to fame is being my grandmother’s favorite. Whoop-de-doo indeed.
“Is this some sort of joke to you, Desmond?” Her eyes gleam under the streetlights, and I realize with cold, dawning horror that it looks like she’s going to cry.
Because of me. She’s going to cry because of what I did. I put those tears in her eyes.
I close the distance between us. “No, Mia. Never.” I lift my hand to her cheek. “Please, just listen to me.”
She trembles, closing her eyes, but she doesn’t push me away. Her skin is soft as silk as I hold her face, afraid to move, afraid to breathe, in case I mess this up any worse than I already have.
Her lip wobbles. I did that to her. Fuck—oh, oh…fuck.
“Ever since you walked into my barbershop, you’ve done your best to make my life more difficult. Why, Des? What is it about me that makes you want to humiliate me like this?”
“You want to know why?” I grate, dropping my hand, suddenly frustrated. “You want to know what my problem is?”
“Please.” She wipes her cheeks with angry movements then crosses her arms, scowling.
I clench my hands into fists, huffing a bitter laugh. “Mia, I’m insanely, unbelievably attracted to you. I’ve wanted you since I first laid eyes on you. When you walk into a room, I can’t fucking think straight. Things come out all wrong, because—” I clamp my lips shut. I’ve said too much. She’ll see right to the core of me, and she’ll see that I don’t belong beside her.
Mia watches me for a beat, then rolls her eyes and snorts. “Right. You humiliated me and lied to me because I’m justsohot. That’s a good one. I’m going home.” She turns to open her door, but I put my hand on it to keep it shut.
“You don’t believe me?”
Facing me once more, Mia cocks a hip and arches her brows at me. “What, that I’m so irresistible that I turn you into this, this…” She waves her hand up and down my body. “This rude, arrogant ass? Please. You walked into my life, lifted my rent so much I can hardly make ends meet, then had the audacity to blamemewhen that dump finally started falling apart. The only reason you offered me the condo on Seventh is because you didn’t want to pay for a hotel. You got off on manipulating me into this date because… I don’t even know why! Maybe you wanted to have yet another opportunity to shove all your money in my face. You wanted to wave your credit card around and treat me to a meal, because you know how fucking poor I am.”
“I just told you why I wanted to take you out. It has nothing to do with money.”
“Give me a break. I don’t buy it for a second. I think you’re just an asshole who gets off on making other people miserable.”
“Mia, the last thing I want you to be is miserable.”
At my words, her eyes flare. There’s a hint of disbelief in her expression, and that just kills me. This woman is going to drive me insane—well,moreinsane. I just told her how crazy she makes me, andshe doesn’t believe me.
Her eyes narrow, and she lifts her chin. “You’re telling me that the reason you’re such an asshole is because you’re so attracted to me it makes you stupid.”
“Yes,” I grate.
“That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard.”
“It’s the truth.”
Suspicion rolls off her in waves. She searches my gaze, lips pursed, body tense. After a long moment, she seems to come to a decision. “Yeah?” Her voice is soft, menacing.
“Yeah, Mia.”
“Prove it.” The words pop on her lips, the challenge hanging in the air between us. A cool breeze makes goosebumps lift over her arms and sends her ponytail fluttering over her shoulder. Leaves rustle in the trees around us, a few of them falling to the ground and scraping over the asphalt of the parking lot.
