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“How can you offer money that you don’t even work for?”
“How can you treat me like this?! You said you loved me. I’m not stupid! You’re trying to push me away—”
“You know what? Yeah! Maybe I am! Maybe I want to, because I can’t do this right now. I can’t be that good guy you see in me. It’s the last thing I want to fucking be right now.”
“I never said I wanted you to be anything but who you are.”
He sighed and shut his eyes very briefly. We were stuck in an uncomfortable, thick silence. I wanted it to end, but I refused to speak first.
So he did.
“I know what you want… and I also know what I want. It’s each other.” His steps were slow but before I knew it he had my face in his hands, his eyes holding mine. “I’m going. I love you with all of my fucking heart, but my grandma once told me that true love means being selfless, not selfish. You deserve better. I have to let you live. I have to live. I have to find myself. I’m fucked up, don’t you see that, babe? I’m so fucked up, and I refuse to involve you in my fucked up, stupid life. My life right now is meaningless—worthless. But yours—fuck, you have so much to look forward to—way more than I can vouch for.”
He swiped my tears away with the pad of his thumbs. My eyes sealed, and I tried so hard not to fall and sob into his chest.
Pulling away, Drake moved backwards and my eyes popped open instantly.
“Wait—Drake!” I grabbed his hand and tugged on it. “I don’t care if you’re fucked up. I want to be here for you.”
He came in my direction again and relief flooded me.
I wrapped my arms around his neck and he blew out a breath as he held me tight around the waist. He breathed so much life into me and he didn’t even know it.
I didn’t get how he couldn’t see the light in himself—how he revolved so much around the darkness of his past, that he couldn’t see the brightness he could create for his future—our future.
Drake was more than he thought he was. He wasn’t bad. He wasn’t wrong. He was learning, just like everyone else.
Learning.
Growing.
Appreciating life for what it was—a chaotic, fucked up mess.
His mouth landed on mine. I still remember this kiss.
His lips were so soft, and he tasted of butterscotch. He smelled so good. My fingers were tight in his hair and his hands were on my hips. He groaned, trying to resist, but he couldn’t.
And neither could I.
He was too irresistible.
Too tempting.
“I have to go, Jenny,” he murmured in my ear when our mouths parted. “Not because I don’t want you to be here for me, but because I want you to see what else is out there. I want you to live the life you deserve.”
“You deserve it, too.” I grabbed his chin as he started to pull away. “No, Drake—please.” I was begging—crying out to him so much. He was already pulling away, but I continued holding on. I didn’t want him to leave.
Never.
He didn’t want to either.
His eyes were damp, on the brink of tears. One of them ran down his cheek, just as two descended mine.
“Drake, I love you,” I breathed. “I—I don’t have to go. I can stay. I can be here for you as much as you need me to be. I’ll go to a community college… it’ll be the same thing.”
He shook his head roughly. “I won’t allow you to stay here and settle for that.” He started for my bedroom door and gripped the handle, but before he could go he looked at me once more.
He watched me with desolate green eyes.
His jaw ticked, the scruff on his chin like a shadow on the lower half of his face.
I heard him swallow. And then he marched for me.
He released the door handle and hurried in my direction, his mouth crushing mine again as soon as he was near. He wrapped me up in his large arms, and I soaked up his affections like a dry sponge.
Lifting me up, he carried me to the bed and I moaned, panting as my fingers threaded through thick, silky black hair. My sex clenched as he dropped between my thighs.
It’d been over a week. I needed to feel him again. It didn’t matter how it was done.
As if he read my mind, he pulled my shirt over my head and I did the same for him. He unbuttoned his jeans as I tugged my skirt down and kicked it off.
It was as soon as we were free, naked, and glued that he took me. He didn’t hold back. Not for a second.
He grunted as he drove deep, and my back arched, toes curling as fingernails sprinted up his back.
