Page 82 of Like I Never Said


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Another horrifying realization occurs to me.I have to tell Elliot.I can’t keep something like meeting his father from him. He’d never forgive me.

A smiling woman with light brown hair is standing at the stove when we enter the kitchen. She hugs both Lauren and Brian, then turns to me. Lauren repeats the earlier introductions. I take a seat at the kitchen counter at Jessica’s—who solved my last name dilemma the same way Elliot’s mother did, by insisting I call her by her first name—request.

I’m hyperaware of Andrew, who’s taken a seat at the kitchen table to flip through mail.

“So you’re from Los Angeles, Auden?” Jessica asks as she mashes potatoes.

“I grew up there, yes.”

“Has the cooler weather up north been a shock?”

Andrew stands and moves into the kitchen.

“Not too bad. I have family in Canada.”

“Oh, really? Whereabouts?”

I glance at Andrew as I reply. “Canmore.” His hand stills on the bottle he was opening. “It’s a small town. Very scenic. Have you heard of it?”

“No, I haven’t. Have you, Andrew?” She glances at her husband, then back at me. “He played hockey in Canada for a bit,” she explains, oblivious to the fact that I already know this.

Andrew isn’t. His blue-gray eyes are focused straight on me as he replies to his wife’s question. “I’ve heard of Canmore, but I didn’t spend much time there.”

“Not enough excitement for you?” It’s a struggle to keep my voice light and not let an edge seep in.

“Something like that.” The top of the bottle comes off with aclank. “I actually have a map of Canada that has Canmore on it in my office. I can show you, if you’d like?”

“Dad,” Lauren groans. “Auden doesn’t want to see some boring map.”

“No, it’s fine. Sounds interesting.”

Lauren sighs but doesn’t say anything else as her father walks out of the kitchen and into the hallway. I follow him past a couple of closed doors and into a small office. A desk takes up most of the space. A large, vintage map hangs behind it. Andrew doesn’t spare it a glance. He turns and looks at me.

“You know my son.”

I gather he’s not talking about Brian. “Yes.”

“Are you going to mention this to him?”

“Yes.”

Andrew nods. “How—how is he?”

“You haven’t been following his season?”

“Of course I have. I mean aside from hockey.”

I shake my head. God, the irony. “You don’t get to ask me that. Not only because you don’t deserve to know anything about the kid you abandoned, but because all Elliot has done for the past eighteen years is focus on nothing but hockey. Because ofyou.”

He doesn’t reply at first. When he does, it’s simply to say, “I can’t change the past.”

I scoff. “I’m going to go. This is too… I won’t say anything to your other family. I’ll make some excuse.”

“When you do talk to Elliot, you don’t need to mention Lauren and Brian.”

“Why? Because you don’t want him to know he has more half-siblings?”

He catches the more. “Good for Josie.” There’s no animosity in his voice. “But, no, because they’re not his half-siblings. They’re not my biological children. I knew Jessica growing up. We lost touch. She ended up in an abusive relationship and needed help getting out. Lauren and Brian don’t know, and I’d like it to stay that way.”

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