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“Why didn’t you go with him?” she asked, noticing how nervous she sounded even to her own ears. His eyes turned away from her hand to look at her face.
“I didn’t want to live the rest of my life as a traitor.” He massaged her index finger then brought it to his mouth, lightly kissing along the underside, tickling her. He stuck his tongue out, licked her, and bit down lightly. Desire shot to her core like an arrow.
Who was manipulating who here? Sheshouldtell him to stop. Instead, she moaned. Altair smiled.
Closing his eyes as he moved on to kiss another finger, he whispered, “Meghan.”
Her body went cold. There was nothing like being called another woman’s name to really kill the mood.
“You should go to bed,” she said.
“Come with me,” he said, looking at her with intense desire in his eyes.
“That’s not a good idea,” she said, though a part of her was curious to know what this kind of undivided attention would feel like on other parts of her body.
“Why not?”
She needed to come up with a good reason, or she’d end up going with him. Maybe alcohol hadn’t been the best idea.
“You’re drunk.”
He frowned, looking unsure whether or not that was a valid excuse. He turned so he faced her body, still laying on her lap.
“We don’t have to do anything,” he said. He put his hand on her thigh and all she could think about was just how close it was to her ass. “I just want to hold you.”
His voice was so full of loneliness and hope that it tugged at her heart. She wondered if his arrogance wasn’t a facade he wore to hide the fact that he was desperate. Desperate for attention, desperate for love, desperate for someone to accept him for the person he was and not the family he’d been born into.
And for the first time since meeting him, she felt a little guilty for using him like everyone else in his life did. Maybe after she’d left Mudden, Nova should contact the real Meghan and find out if she would be interested in starting her life over with her perfect match.
But for now, all he had was Nova.
“Come on,” she said, getting up. “Our clothes stay on the whole time.”
He smiled a smile so genuine and pure she couldn’t help but smile back.
She grabbed his hand, walked to his bedroom, and lay down on the bed. When Altair lay next to her, she turned to face him, wrapping her arm around his waist to hug him. She still felt tingly from the hand massage, and his smell combined with his warm, hard body pressed against her didn’t improve the situation. But he made no moves to do anything more. He just rested his head above hers and fell asleep with a small smile on his face.
She, on the other hand, couldn’t relax. Not that she could have slept through the drunk snoring anyway. She lay there trying not to think about how good it felt to be hugging someone again. Even if that someone was Altair. He moved his arm along her back, sending waves of electricity up and down her spine.
Maybeespeciallywhen that someone was Altair.
* * *
Nova woke up when she heard Altair moan and move away from her. He lay on his back with his arm over his eyes. Her hand rested on his chest, looking small and fragile. She could feel his heartbeat underneath her palm, and her own heart sped up in response.
She hated how much she liked this, lying in bed with a man, touching him. A part of her really wanted that, and the realization hurt.
She’d decided long ago that she wouldn’t do relationships. It was too dangerous in her line of work. Besides, let’s face it, it always ended in heartbreak, and Nova was good at a lot of things but healing a broken heart was not one of them. After a second break up sent her spiraling into depression again, she decided she’d had enough. She still slept with men, even dated sometimes, but she always kept it casual, always had her walls up to make sure she didn’t fall in love.
She even went so far as to pick the wrong men, men she didn’t particularly like, to make sure she wouldn’t be tempted to fall for them. That’s what Connor had been. She’d had fun with him but she’d never risked her heart. He’d also been her mark, and he hadn’t liked finding out he’d been used. She’d had to admit to herself that even casual relationships ended up being more trouble than they were worth. But the only other option was to give up men entirely, and that was…not sustainable long term. At some point, her body needed more, though shehadlasted three years.
Maybethatwas the reason she now found herself craving the one thing she’d told herself she didn’t want, didn’t need.
Maybe if she were more careful to pick the right person it would work out next time. She snorted. She just didn’t believe that. The chances that she could make it work with someone forever, that someone would even want to be with her forever, just seemed unlikely. About as likely as finding a…a flintoid statue on a backwater planet. Yet she’d found that.
Altair claimed to want to be with her forever. No. He hadn’t married Nova, he’d married Meghan. Meghan was the type of good, respectable woman who could find someone to be with her forever. Nova, on the other hand, just needed to have sex, get those desires out of her system, and forget this nonsense.
She sat up in one sudden motion. There was no point thinking about this, all it did was upset her.
