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Her eyebrows met. “That’s a simplistic, if not pessimistic, view on relationships. I’m sure Carson has a reasonable explanation. Talk to him first. Okay? And Cary came to talk to me. That’s all we’re doing. So please try to act civil.”
I left her and headed outside for a cigarette. I still had a stash which I hid inside a ceramic box by the door.
After lighting my cigarette, I stood at the Mercury fountain and smoked pensively when a deep voice came from behind.
“May I bother you for one?” Cary smiled apologetically.
I passed the pack to him and the lighter. “I’ve never seen you smoke.”
“I do on occasion.” As smoke exited his lips, I studied his handsome face and could understand my mother’s infatuation.
With that combed-back, greying hair, fitted tweed jacket, and tall, slender stature, Cary gave off that look of refinement that matched my mother perfectly.
That’s where we differed. An image of Carson with his checkered shirt rolled up at the sleeves, exposing his tattooed muscular arms, made my heart sigh. Give me alpha males any day. Alpha on the outside, beta on the inside. That was Carson, a hundred percent.
A sweet giant of a man who could crush a walnut with his fist.
That silly thought made my face crack as I smiled to myself.
Stop dreaming. Who’s that blond girl?
“I’m sorry if my being here is causing some distress.” Cary’s eyes had that genial warmth, which made it difficult to remain critical. I reminded myself of Will, who also had that quality. Only Cary had more personality, in that he liked to talk.
“I’m worried about my mother. Her last relationship didn’t end well. And I’m sure she told you about my father.”
He nodded. “Long-term marriage can be complicated. Even when passion fades, one’s sense of duty never ceases.”
My ravenous relationship with Carson, and how we couldn’t stop fucking, came to mind. I wasn’t that naïve to think we’d always engage in hungry sex, but I liked to think that he’d still make my pulse race and that he’d hold me every night.
“I take it you’re still married.” I stubbed out my cigarette and coughed. It tasted awful despite the nicotine high.
“I am. And I’ll remain so. Caroline understands. I explained it to her. It’s just that we’re in love.”
I frowned. “Who, with your wife or my mother?”
“Your mother. I’m head over heels in love.”
“Love conquers everything, they say. Isn’t that enough to overcome difficulties?”
“In a perfect world, yes. Only… sometimes it’s not so straightforward. Not when you’re dealing with a frail person who you promised to love ‘in sickness and in health.’”
“It’s admirable that you want to uphold your promise. However, divorce happens all the time.”
He looked down at the ground and ran his fingers through his thick greyish hair. “My wife has terminal cancer.”
I was taken aback, and my heart went out to him. The depth of sorrow was clear in his eyes. Even an excellent actor couldn’t have shown that look of despair.
“Oh. I’m so sorry.” I took a moment to consider this situation between him and my mother. “Then why go around saying you’re divorced?”
“I was smitten and thus made a feeble, if not regrettable, attempt at winning her attention.” His mouth curled up at one end. “And my wife has asked to keep her condition private. But I can’t stay away from your mother, either. We’re in love.” His dark eyes shimmered with sincerity.
“I understand you can’t leave your sick wife when she’s in that state, but you were here for a month.”
“It’s only been a recent request by my wife that I remain there, close. Before that, she was with her family. She didn’t want to stop me from living my life, but she’s since had a change of heart. Which is fine by me. I’ll do anything to make her feel comfortable and loved.”
“That’s so sad.”
He smiled tightly. “This is a flying visit. I have to go back, as you can understand. I just needed to see your mother to explain.”
