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“No, I’ll help with breakfast.” A second later, he’s snoring.
He hates that I let him sleep in, but he needs the rest. He’s still training as often as he can, trying to make the most of what the coaches have to offer before he goes to Duke in the fall. My chest aches at the thought of him leaving, of not being able to have these moments with him every day. But my pride in him quickly kills those thoughts. I kiss him once before leaving the room and going to the kitchen. Mom’s already up, sitting at the table with her tablet. “You okay, Mama?” I ask, kissing the scars that made her the woman she is today. I used to think they’d made her a stranger, but the meds she’s been on lately have given the real her back to me, and I couldn’t be happier because of it.
“I’m fine, sweetheart, just wanted to get back to my book.”
“That good, huh?”
She nods. “Reading has helped me a lot, actually.”
“It has?”
“I think it allows me to feel like I’m living, you know?”
I switch on the stove and put the pan on the heat before turning to her. “What do you mean?”
“It was starting to get to me—being in the house all day—this allows me to see and feel things without ever leaving.”
“Do you want to leave?” I ask. “Because you can, we all can, like we did with Connor and… you went to his game, and that wasn’t so bad.”
She shrugs. “Maybe one day I’ll feel more comfortable. This town isn’t very friendly.”
“Yeah,” I sigh out, my mind lost with thoughts of our future. I just need time, I tell myself. Soon, we’ll be out of here for good.
“Hey,” she whispers, looking toward my room. “Is Connor here?”
“Yeah, he’s sleeping.”
“I have a surprise for him.”
I smile. “What’s your surprise?”
She gets to her feet and undoes the tie of her robe, revealing what she’s wearing underneath. I can’t help but laugh. “He’s going to love it.”
A couple of hours later, my bedroom door opens, and Connor appears, rubbing his eyes. He walks into the kitchen, stopping when he sees Mom standing by the sink, her back turned to him. Eyes wide, his instant grin fills my heart with joy. I say through a laugh, “Look what Mama got Trevor to order for her.”
Wearing a high school All-American jersey with Connor’s name and number on the back, Mom turns around, her smile matching his.
“Hey, it looks good on you!” Connor exclaims, suddenly awake and full of life. He moves to her, kisses her right on the scars like he does most mornings. “Where did you even get this? I don’t even have one yet.”
Mom giggles. “I have my ways,” she says, patting his cheek. “When do you fly out?”
“Just before midday,” he answers.
“Is your dad going with you?”
“Nah, he couldn’t get the time off work.”
“Really?” I ask, cutting into their conversation, my concern evident. “Will you be okay?” I try to ask the question as vaguely as possible because I know about his fear of airports, but Mom doesn’t, and I don’t know if he wants her knowing.
Connor winks at me, his smile still there. “Yeah, I’m good, babe. I’m a big boy now.”
Trevor walks into the kitchen and drops down in his chair, grumbling, “Mama Jo, you never wore my jerseys.”
Mom rolls her eyes. “That’s because football’s for pussies.”
Connor busts out a laugh, and I giggle, squeezing Trevor’s shoulder as he says, “I feel like I’ve been replaced by the golden boy.”
“Never,” Mom tells him, laughing as she walks toward the door.
