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He absolutely did not.
And maybe, justmaybe, I can use this opportunity to finally convince them of that. To prove it to them. To make them see that not only did henotseduce me but he’s not the evil, inhuman asshole that they think he is. That evenIthought he was.
I know lying is bad but I only do it so I can show them that I’m good.
“I promise.”
* * *
Iwant to do it.
I’ve been wanting to do it for the past two days.
Ever since he gave me this phone.
I’ve been toying with this idea of texting him but I’ve been stopping myself.
For many, many reasons.
The biggest one being the disaster from last time when we had any contact over the phone. Although I know I’m being irrational here. The circumstances are totally different. Before, we were enemies, staunch and forever. Now, not so much.
Now we’re working together and we’ve turned over a new leaf.
Now he makes me feel safe.
Which brings me to the second reason: this phone is only for emergencies.
A work phone, if you will.
And we’re not working right now. The other night, while coming back to campus, Reign told me the next opportunity to see Lucas would be sometime next week, which let me just point out that I’m so relieved about; after two very disastrous encounters with my ex-boyfriend, I need a break. I need to just stay away from him for a little while. So there’s not even a need to switch the phone on.
However.
There’s this big thing.
That my work phone has… reading apps.
Yup.
It has an app for ebooks, something that I love to pieces.Pieces.
I’m actually a fan of both, paperbacks and ebooks, and so I read on both. Which means I read two books at any given time.
But as much as I love paperbacks, I have to say that I love the idea of carrying around a library in my pocket even more. I love the idea of browsing through that library with only a touch of my fingers and that I can read well into the night even when everything is dark around me. I used to do that a lot: paperbacks during the day and around school, ebooks at night, lying down on my side with the phone propped up on the pillow.
So I should text him, right?
If not for anything else but to thank him at least. For giving me this phone with reading apps on it. Even though it’s hard to read on the tiny screen, it’s still the best thing I’ve ever gotten. Maybe he doesn’t even know the kindness he’s done me.
Up in my bedroom, propped up on my pillows, I switch on the phone and open the text app.
His number is the only one saved on here. Oh, and the name it’s saved under is Bossman.
Yeah, hilarious.
Shaking my head, I type in:
Hi.
