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On it.
Dropping my phone, I pull Ellie closer. This is how it has to be. We don’t live in a fairytale and we sure as fuck won’t get a happily ever after.
23
Ellie
I wake up surrounded by warmth. Rolling over, I find Jafar facing me. For the first time since Al raped me, I didn’t have a nightmare all night long. Hope blooms in my chest. Things are going to work out, and this is a sign. I don’t even need to see my horoscope to know that.
“Morning,” I whisper.
He looks even more handsome now than I’ve ever seen him look before. I want to run my fingers through his hair, but there’s a look in his eyes that has me stopping. My heart pounds.
“Is it Al? Did you find him?”
Something that looks a lot like regret flashes in his eyes. Suddenly, I have a very good idea where this is going. I pull back, needing space for what he’s about to say.
Please don’t do this. To me. To us.
He sits. “Ellie, I think you should go home.”
“Home?”
“To Kansas,” he clarifies.
“Was it— did I do something wrong?”
His jaw tics. “There’s no reason for you to stay.”
“But I thought—”
“You thought what? That we’d magically end up together after fucking a few times? That something would ever happen between us? That you would be enough for me? As Jasmine told you, I’ve cheated before. This is just another notch on my bedpost. An easy notch at that.”
My heart feels like it’s being shredded into a million pieces, and I jerk back, as if I’ve been slapped.
“Jafar—”
“No, tell me, Ellie. What did you think was going to happen?” He runs his hand through his hair. “I’m married to your fucking best friend. This was only ever going to be a quick romp in the bed. I’m sorry if you thought otherwise.”
My chest is tight, and I feel like I can’t breathe. All the words and moments that we’ve shared these past three days rush through my mind. Did it truly mean nothing? DidImean nothing?
He reaches over to his nightstand for something. My heart falls when I see he’s holding a check.
“This should be more than enough.”
“For what? Myservices?” I spit out the words. “To pay me off?”
He shrugs. “For whatever you need to tell yourself to make this right. Take the money and go, Ellie. Go before Jasmine finds out what you’ve done.”
WhatI’vedone. Not whatwe’vedone. He’s right. The blame will fall on me. Jasmine will see it as a betrayal on my end and yet another indiscretion for him that will be swept under the carpet. Al’s words echo through my mind.No one will believe you.He was right. Oh my god, he was right. My eyes fill with tears and Jafar lets out a loud sigh.
“I’m going to shower. Please be gone by the time I get out.”
He stands, walking toward the bathroom. He’s done this before, I realize. He’s fucked a woman, paid her off, and then walked naked across the room as if nothing had transpired. The door closes, and the shower turns on a moment later. Oh my god. This can’t be happening. I want to go after him and scream at him, but I don’t. Because I’m suddenly so tired, and I know it won’t make a difference.
I am worthless, and this just reaffirms my thoughts. How foolish of me to be hopeful. People like me always get the shit end of the stick, and this is just one more reminder of that.
I force myself to get out of bed. My clothes are strewn everywhere, a bitter reminder of what happened when we got home last night. Home. What a joke. This isn’t my home. This is his home. Mine is in Kansas, as he cruelly reminded me. It takes a moment to find the clothes I arrived in the other day, but once I do, I dress. I will not take the ones he bought me. My pride won’t allow it.
