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Ella
The hours went by like the water in our Winter Court streams . . . trickling and slow. Basically, nonexistent. My plan was all laid out. I was going to disguise myself as Draya and sneak into Kai’s cabin. This time, I was going to get the job done. No hesitation.
“Deep in thought?” Merrick chided from across the room.
Lifting my glass, I swirled the blue faerie wine around, but I had yet to drink any. It was probably best to keep my mind clear. With a smile, I peered at him over my shoulder and set my glass on the windowsill. Merrick looked handsome dressed in a simple white tunic and brown pants.
“One of these days, you’re going to wish you spent more time in the Hereafter enjoying your afterlife instead of stalking me.” He smirked and I smiled wider. “I’m kidding. You know I love having you around.”
I focused back on the window and watched the snow fall. Merrick came up beside me and draped an arm over my shoulders. I’d never understood how Keepers and the dead could touch, but I was glad we had that connection.
“I’ve watched over you since you were a baby, Ella. You may have sworn off having a Guardian, but I feel like I’ve taken it upon myself to be yours.”
My eyes burned. “I’m lucky to have you in my life, but it hurts my heart that I’m the only one who can see you.”
Merrick kissed the side of my head. “It’s not so bad anymore. This is the way it’s supposed to be. Maybe one day, when you and Iston rule over the Frost Court and have children, you’ll have a daughter who’ll be a Keeper and can see me too.”
The thought of Iston made my stomach sink with guilt. Kai, a fucking Shadow fae, had kissed me and I enjoyed it. Iston didn’t deserve to be deceived like that.
I slid out from under Merrick’s arm and faced him. “There isn’t going to be an Iston and me. So when he returns from the hunting trip, I’m going to turn down his proposal.”
Merrick sighed. “Is it because you kissed the Shadow fae?”
Afraid I’d see the disgust on his face, I turned away. “There’s something wrong with me, Merrick. I don’t know what’s going on, but I do know I don’t want Iston to get hurt.”
Merrick grabbed my shoulders. “Look at me, Ella.” When I did, there was nothing but concern in his eyes. “Iston isn’t the type to let go so easily. He’ll fight for you.”
I shook my head. “Not if I don’t want to be fought for.”
I didn’t deserve his loyalty and love when I betrayed him. I closed my eyes and envisioned Draya in my mind, feeling my magic transforming me into her. When I opened them again, Merrick stepped back.
“What are you going to do?” he asked, lifting a curious brow at my new form.
I placed a hand on the hilt of my dagger. “What I should’ve done the other night. I’ll be back.”
The air shimmered in the corner of the room, and I could see darkness and trees through the portal to the mortal world.
“Be careful, Ella,” Merrick warned.
Breathing in slowly, I stepped toward the portal. “I will.”
When I walked through, the fresh scent of pine engulfed me. All was quiet and serene, the moon shining its vibrant glow on the tops of the trees in the mountainy distance. Kai’s cabin was dark, with no light on in his entire place. There was a black truck in the driveway, which was odd because Draya’s little red car should’ve been there too. Someone moved it.
Nevertheless, I could feel Kai’s presence inside. The magnetic pull I felt the last time I was here was even stronger now.
I slowly crept toward the front porch even though everything inside of me demanded I go faster and get closer. There was a mixture of desire and hate both burning through me. I wanted to latch onto the hate, but my traitorous body gripped onto the desire.
Once I reached the front door, I stopped and clasped the hilt of my dagger. I gripped it so hard, the indentation of the handle caused a surge of pain to shoot up my arm. I needed the pain, the distraction. I had a job to do, and I was going to see it through.
Using my fire magic, I melted the lock and crept inside. The pull grew stronger, guiding me down the hallway toward a door that was open just a sliver. When I peered inside, I could see Kai asleep on the bed, his bare Winter skin illuminated by the moonlight filtering through the window.
Heart racing, I slipped inside and unsheathed my dagger. My traitorous body clenched with need at the sight of him, and I hated him for it. I wanted to touch his skin, feel him hard and ready between my legs.
Ella, stop! What the hell is wrong with you?
I clenched my teeth and willed those thoughts out of my mind, forcing them into the deepest, darkest depths of my being. There was no time to waste.
I approached the bed, my steps light and swift. All I had to do was thrust my dagger into his heart, and then it’d all be over. There was no counting to three or hesitation. Once I was close enough to the bed, I lifted the dagger and summoned every ounce of strength I had.
