Page 11 of Mr. Fake Husband


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I would have taken this deal without the money. The money is just the way I justified my own heaping dose of patheticness and a crush that I haven’t been able to shake.

I’m more worried about that than anything. That I’m going to slip up this week, this week is actually going to be torture, and nothing will go the way I planned, which was basically a horribly cobbled together set of hopes and girly, childish dreams that if we spent a week together, we’d actually find that we like each other, maybe even more than like, and maybe things could blossom from there. I have to play my cards just right, and I’ve never been very good at cards. I’ve never been very good at games in general. My siblings kick my ass at family board game night every time. I have no poker face. They’d tell me that I have no skill at games and no game at games. And this isn’t a game. Leon isn’t a game. Leon is real, and I don’t want to hurt him. I really don’t want to hurt myself either.

By the time we actually get to the cabin, I’m a bit of a wreck. I’m so relieved to find the driveway so I can get out of the silent car, breathe in the fresh, clean lake air, and let it help me settle my nerves and screw my head back on that I nearly let out a cry of joy when I spot the wooden driveway sign standing proudly on two wood posts at the end of the driveway.

I turn in and drive down the winding, tree-lined, narrow little strip of cleared land that passes for a road. I let out a cry of surprise and joy when I break through the clearing and see a black truck, undoubtedly my brother’s, and my grandparent’s old dusty boat of a car.

“Oh my gosh! Some of my family is here!”

Leon blanches. Like literally, his face loses color, and it’s night and hard to tell, so that really is saying something. “Yippee,” he covers up by stating dryly, like a huge ass.

Bum stick two. Darby zero.

My brother bursts out of the cabin door at the same time I get out of the driver’s seat. We both stare at each other for a second, kind of in shock, before we rush at each other across the yard for a hug. We see each other often in the city, but it’s been a long time since we’ve seen each other out here, and this is our happy place.

The second that Nate’s arms wrap around my shoulders, I realize my family is here. Here! And so am I, with my boss, who is also my husband. I mean, I’m wearing a freaking wedding band on my left hand.

Shitshizzle.I have some mega explaining to do, and I have no idea where to start.

5

LEON

“Who’s that?”

I hear Darby’s brother—I think it’s her brother based on their familiarity with each other and the fact that she said it was her family that was there—ask from twenty feet away when they finally stop hugging. Hugging is overrated. My sister tries to hug me all the time. It’s appallingly nonsensical, but she often persists in doing it anyway, and I pretend I don’t actually like it. It’s a game she’s perfectly content to let me play.

Darby whirls around like she just remembered that her baggage and duffel are in the car. The baggage is me, obviously. I still have no idea why she was so keen on bringing me. Probably to punish me. She probably has an innate sense for things like this, knowing that I’d hate it, and this was part of my penance. Actually, no, she seems too sweet for that. Maybe she really didn’t think we could make this happen any other way. Then again, it’s always the sweet ones you have to watch out for.

Darby’s voice is soft and uncertain. “Nate…that’s my boss.”

“The asshole?” He doesn’t even bother muttering it under his breath.

“No! Just…just my boss. Not an asshole. I’ve never called him that, and I don’t even think it.”

“No, but he never gives you time off.”

“That’s because no one can take holidays their first year. I didn’t have any seniority. It wasn’t his fault.”

“Kind of standing right over here,” I mutter, kicking the grass with the tip of my shoe. My sister would die of shock and delight if she realized I was actually wearing the canvas-style things she gave me that are supposed to be kind of dressy but also not dressy. They have no laces, and they’re brown. They’re a bit of a puzzle to me.

Nate points at the car. “That’s a crazy car for coming out here. Down the grids? Really? Is that electric? There’s hardly any clearance under it. You’re lucky an errant tree root sticking out of the ground didn’t tear out the whole undercarriage.”

“Still right here.”

Darby and Nate ignore me completely. Normally I like being ignored, but my head is pounding, and I was looking forward to a dark room and a week of locking myself in said room and working on my laptop, surviving from the food stash in my suitcase like a marooned astronaut and purposely not having any fun, just to make a point. I was not planning on arriving at a cabin buzzing with life.

“Grandma and Grandpa are here too. We’re just staying until tomorrow.”

Oh, thank god.

Nate’s brow wrinkles like he can hear my thoughts. “How long are you going to be here?”

“For a week. It’s going to be so great!” Darby answers before I can say anything.

Nate’s obviously really shaken by that prospect, which makes two of us. “You’re staying alone with this guy for a week? Please tell me this isn’t some fucked-up work retreat thing that’s actually code for him taking advantage of you then lording it over you in some sick power trip because he’s your boss. I will end that douchecanoe if that’s what’s going on.”

Douchecanoe.I like that, actually, even if I’ve had just about enough. I can think of one way to either get myself out of this real fast or guarantee my ass getting locked in a dark room for the rest of the night, alone, because no one will want to talk to me. Certainly not Darby. It’s a dick move, but right now, with my head about to explode, I’m not above it.

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