Page 11 of Be Free My Heart


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"Why would Naomi be gone?"

"Because if the white men raided our village, they would see she is white and take her."

Matt nodded. "Yeah, I guess they would. Then why on earth did he marry you?"

"My parents died, and he wanted more children." She answered with surprise. "You seem angry."

"Well, I thought you wanted to get back to him. That you loved him…. That you cared about him. Now I wonder if I do you a disservice."

"I do care…he is a great warrior and provider." She smiled. "He took me to wife to provide more children and to protect me. I am proud to be his wife. Or I was. Now…it is different. I am like Naomi would be going back to her husband. I have known a man."

"But you don't love him?"

She took a deep quelling breath. "I do not know…yet!" She explained. "I have not known him in that way. I respect him though. He is handsome, a good dog soldier and a good provider. I cannot ask more than that."

"I can see a lot of differences in our people." Matt proclaimed. "And if he disowns you?"

"Then I will leave the village and go down into the valley and find work, so I can support my child."

"Well, I don't understand that at all." Matt shook his head and walked ahead of her now. "White women marry for love."

"Is not this love you speak of something that grows between a man and a woman?"

"That's the way of it."

She grew quiet. "Had he taken me already, I might know if I love him. But he hasn't. And, since my sister loves him, I-I do not know if I could love him. For me to love him would take away from her."

Matt shook his head.

They made camp that night, and then settled in for the night.

They finally went to sleep.

They were making nearly twenty miles a day as they traveled, but Matt wanted to make better time. The cold of winter would set in soon, and the closer to the mountains they got, the colder it would get.

He also worried if Toby would follow, like Jake said.

He kept a watch over his shoulder, but it didn't look as though they followed.

Indians were more complicated than white people, Matt decided. But Snow Bird gave him no trouble and he finally settled out. It wasn't his business, he finally decided. If she was happy with the arrangement, it wasn't his place to dissuade her from it. But if her husband shunned her, what would become of her and the baby. That worried him a bit.

As they ate that night, she watched him closely. "Are you married, Matt?"

He frowned, he didn't care to continue talking about this subject, because he certainly didn't understand her.

"No, I'm not."

"Why?"

"I guess I haven't spent much time thinking about women. Since I left home, I've worried about how to make a living. Jobs are hard to come by, especially if you don't live in the town, or people don't know you." Matt defended.

"So, are you a trapper?"

"No, I figured you knew. I was an outlaw." He confessed easily enough with a slight smile.

"You do not have the heart of an outlaw. Is that all you know to do?"

"No ma'am. I do trap a lot, mainly because I'm hungry though. I've done a little blacksmithing, a little ranching."

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