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She eyed him strangely. She nodded, curled up against him and went to sleep. Strange how she trusted him. He didn't understand how she could. In her place, he wouldn't.
But as he lay there, with her against him to keep warm, he listened to her breathing, listened to the crickets, and the call of the frogs near the stream. He wondered if he could ever get used to a woman cuddling up against him like this. Not that it was unpleasant, it wasn't but, it gave him a sense of peace he'd never known before, an inner peace. For the first time in his life someone depended on him, and it made him feel nine feet tall.
He wondered about the baby. It was an innocent in this. He wondered what she'd want to do if Too Tall shunned her too.
The next morning Ferg was pouring himself a cup of coffee he'd made early that morning, "Your gonna have to do better than that, son. Someone will take her away from you quick. Understand? I'm only telling you this because I see something between the two of you. Sutton's Place is a good place during winter, but lots of road trash gather here too. You gotta be prepared. And if you are thinking of faking son, I'm afraid you'll be caught in the act. She's a squaw and most white men figure that makes her easy prey. So, take her son, get it over with and take her."
Matt frowned and nodded. "You don't understand, she trusts me Ferg. And I feel responsible for her."
"Even more reason to take her son. Once you claim her, they'll leave her alone. But until you do, you're gonna have hell keeping her. I can tell you that for fact. A few years back we had a fella like you. Only his wife was white, and he was married to her, but she was a religious gal and didn't want to make love. So, he didn't. A fe
lla came along and decided he would. The man had to fight him, and he died of a knife wound. The woman belonged to the winner. So, take her. That's the way it is up here."
Matt's face drained of color. Ferg was right. But how was he going to convince Snow Bird?
"Ever had anyone depend on you Ferg, trust you?" Matt looked him square in the eye.
Ferg studied that question for a while, sipping his coffee, "No," He shook his head, "not in a very long time. I was married once, long time ago. We were kids. Kind of like you two. She trusted me. It was good…."
"What happened?"
"Seven men, that's what happened." Ferg's face turned almost black with remembering the fury inside him. "Seven of them, come upon our place one night. They came to rob us, but they saw her and got sidetracked. They took her, in front of me. All of them. They kept doing it. I was going pert near crazy. They turned her head, so she could see the anguish on my face as they took her. She was in total shock, I saw the trust on her face disappear slowly. There was nothing I could do, they held me at gunpoint while they violated her."
"So, what happened?" Matt frowned seeing the distress on Ferg's face.
"Nothin' at the time, only she died three days later. I sat at her side holding her hand and kissing her. But she died anyway even after I prayed, she wouldn't. Then I saddled up and went after them. It took five years to find them all, but I did it and I killed every one of them. When the last died by my gun, I took the gun off my hip and became a fur trapper. The last one was a young fool. He'd pleaded with me not to kill him. Begged me even. He apologized a million times until my gun went off and he went silent. Maybe if he hadn't said anything, I wouldn't have killed him, but he kept on and on about what they did. I saw red. That's when I gave it all up. Her dying was avenged, but I was through. First time I've thought about that in a long, long, time." Ferg said staring out over the land. "So, take her, protect her, and you'll never be sorry."
"All I wanted to do was get her back to her people safe." Matt declared.
"You ain't never had relations with her, have you, son?"
Matt fidgeted. But he couldn't lie to Ferg. He'd see right through it. "No sir. Not with her or any other woman. But you don't understand, she's married to a buck. So, I was taking her back to be with him. It's the Christian thing to do. Besides, there is something I haven't told you."
"Christian huh? I hate to tell you this son, but I doubt her people are even alive. I doubt she has anything to go back to. What you're doin', it's kind of noble, but it could get you both killed. And I'd hate to see or hear of that. You gotta know that it would be suicide. Is it that important? I mean after you take her, don't you think she might want to stay with you? Looks like you've been pretty good to her. And I've seen her looking at you. I wish a woman would look at me like that."
"Like what?" Matt asked staring at Ferg now.
"Like she wants to be your woman but is scared to ask."
"Ferg, promise me you won't tell anyone, but the boys about what I'm going to tell you."
Ferg studied him, then nodded slowly. "I promise."
"She was raped by the man at the General Store in the valley. She's pregnant by him. "Matt frowned again, scratching his chin. "I'm taking her back, and if they are gone, I'll take care of her, if she'll let me. I'll even raise her child as mine, but it's up to her, not me."
Ferg stared at him, then her. "Well, I got news for you son, if she's been had, that buck won't have her. He'll throw her out of their camp and not look back at her. They hate anything white. Especially right now. Why if they got a hold of her kid, they'd make a slave of him, that's what they would do."
"I kind of think you are right about that, just from what she's told me. But she wants to face it, and know for herself, and I can't fault her for that."
Ferg stared into Matt's eyes, "Women, no matter their breed are precious out here in the wilderness. Finding one that is trusting and loyal is even more precious. Take care of her right. She looks to be worth it son." Ferg smiled and went to check on the horses.
Matt studied that statement for a long while. Ferg was a trapper, but there was more to the man than that. A lot more. He had the kind of common sense that Matt recognized as intelligent. He'd lived life and learned from that. And Matt knew he could learn a lot from these men.
Matt didn't take the advice lightly. He studied on it. What if her folks were dead? Was he ready to be a husband and a father? And more importantly, would she let him be that for her? With no certain path decided, he knew that if she'd allow it, he'd take her care of her and the baby. It was the Christian thing to do. But what he suddenly realized was that he cared for Snow Bird. And she was the first female he had any feelings for, aside from his family.
Matt never considered a woman for himself. He'd left home so early in life, he did good just staying alive. Now, as he thought on it, he realized he was coming to have a certain amount of feelings for Snow Bird. It shocked him. He knew he shouldn't allow those feelings to affect his decisions, but they automatically did. He knew and understood her fierce loyalty to her husband would be between them. And she might not take to his raising her child, but he knew instinctively he'd do it. He had to take her home. And taking her right now was not an option he wanted to contemplate. It seemed to violate everything he was trying to do for her. But the truth was, it was not an option. He had to take her to keep her alive. And Matt was determined to keep her alive.
Just the thought of someone taking her, maybe hurting the baby in the process upset him.
