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"They were in the big cities, but the small towns still keep them going." He informed her as he stretched himself and pushed his hat back on his head.
"I thought we were going home," she said tightly.
"Well, I figured this might be the last time we were together, so I thought we should make the most of it. This should keep everyone from talking now."
She nodded, "Alright. So what kind of July celebration do you have?"
"Just a rodeo, beauty pageant, fair grounds kind of thing. Real small town stuff. You will probably be home by that time."
When she was silent, he glanced over at her, pulling her closer.
"Put your head on my shoulder, make it look good. Don't worry, I won't touch you again." he assured her.
Obviously he could turn things on and off better than she could. She wanted him to touch her, kiss her, and take away this misery inside of her.
Instead he talked about the weather, his job, her photographs, everything except the two of them and what had transpired earlier, and all at such a close distance, she'd only have to reach a couple of inches to taste his lips again.
Strangely though, the tension finally began to subside and she began to relax. He went for popcorn, and they shared it, talking about anything and everything, except their feelings. She learned about his dad who had been a lawman all his life, and his sister who was going to college this fall. She learned about his mother who taught him about beauty and respect.
"Were...you very in love with her?" she blurted out half way through the movie.
"What?" he whispered, his face nearly touching hers as he looked into her eyes.
"I said, were you very in love with her?"
"Who?" his face mirrored the question.
"You're ex-wife."
For a moment she thought he wasn't going to answer, but slowly he seemed to unwind.
"I thought I was. But then after a while, you realize it's your ego hurting, not your heart." He admitted freely, his eyes going over her as he spoke. "And how about you, were you madly in love with this...Chad, was it?"
"Yes...no, I mean, Chad and I grew up together, lived close and went out regularly for years. Our families just took it for granted we'd marry. He was a lot of fun...but not very intense, if you know what I mean."
"Then why were you going to marry him?"
Savannah rose up, straightened up and didn't look at Ben. She couldn't. She could see where he might have gotten the idea she was just like his ex-wife, an air-head.
"Being with Chad was comfortable. I liked that feeling. You grow up with certain notions. And I guess over time I took it for granted we would be married. I'll admit it was not a very physical relationship, but I was content with that until we could be married."
Ben straightened too, his muscles tensing against his shirt, "You're in love with being married."
Savannah thought about that a moment and agreed, "I guess I was."
"And you can still want marriage after what you've been through with this Chad?" he questioned as though he couldn't quite believe her.
"Well, yes. I guess it's different for men. It must be. But you see, my sisters are married, and have families. They are both very happy. They dated local boys so the family already knew them too, just like Chad. We have family get-togethers, and with the kids, there is a lot of us. It's what I've always wanted."
"Didn't you go to college?"
"As a matter of fact I did. But I'm not very career minded. I mean I can play the harp like an angel, I know instinctively a lot about photography and what people want to see. I even became a real estate agent, it was easy, I'd lived there all my life, knew most of the properties by heart. But my heart wasn't in making a career. Especially when my father arranged it all. I envied my sisters. I wanted what they had, happiness."
He turned to look at her with an incredulous smirk on his face, "You mean, rather than make lots of money, you'd rather be sitting at home, waiting for the husband to get home, mending your kid’s clothes and cooking and cleaning all day? You can
't mean that. You obviously haven't been raised like that. Why would you want it?"
The very idea of him mocking her made her anger flare, "Does there have to be a reason? What's so wrong with that? I admit I never did dishes. We had maids all my life. But that doesn't make me unprepared for being a good wife and mother. Why, Aunt Lucy has taught me so much, and I enjoy it too."
