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“I saw. I just…couldn’t.”
“That’s alright. I’m so sorry about your mom.”
He doesn’t reply. After a minute, he rolls over and buries his face in my neck. He wraps his arms around me and holds on like he’s clinging to a life preserver in a turbulent river. If only I could save him from this.
All I can do is hold him while his body shakes with silent sobs. It rips me open to see him suffering. Tears drip down my face while I rub his back. There’s nothing I can say or do to make it any better. After a few minutes, he takes a deep breath and his grip on me loosens.
He turns over onto his back and scrubs at his face with his hands. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to lose it on you. Fuck.”
“You don’t need to be sorry. It’s okay.”
“I didn’t really mean to come here, but I saw your car in the driveway.”
“I’m glad you’re here. You can probably use the door from now on,” I tease, and I’m glad to see a little grin get tossed in my direction.
“Considering that damn trellis snapped in one spot and almost dropped me on my ass, that’s not a bad idea.”
“Do you want to talk about it, Den?”
“No.” He sniffs and takes another deep breath. “Let’s talk about anything else. Let’s talk about you. How long are you in town?”
He rolls onto his side, so we’re facing each other. God, even tear stained, the man is gorgeous. “I’m staying. I’m moving in with Tori on Monday.”
His eyebrows leap up. “I didn’t know you were moving back. I thought maybe you came, you know, for the funeral.”
“I did. I mean, I was coming for the funeral, for you and Oliver. It’s a long story, but I made the decision to move at the last moment.”
I’d forgotten how scrutinizing those dark eyes could be. “Doyouwant to talk about it?”
Why not? It’s distracting him. “My original plan was to come back after college, but by graduation, I had a boyfriend I’d been with for over a year. He asked me to move in with him. I liked Florida, but it’s expensive, and I couldn’t find a good job. There was no shortage of photographers freelancing, too much competition. I’ll have a better chance here.”
“And the boyfriend?”
“He was a mistake that I spent too much time making. His reaction to me coming home to visit was the final straw. It opened my eyes, you know? Made me face the fact I was staying because it was easier than making a change. It never felt like home there.”
Alden leans up on his elbow to look down at me. “You left your boyfriend yesterday? Just like that?”
“He told me if I left to come home not to come back. It made me realize I didn’t want to come back.” Wilson chooses that moment to call my phone again. It lights up silently and I roll my eyes after I see his name, then toss it on the bed beside me. “He didn’t think I’d really leave, I guess. He’s still blowing up my phone.”
Alden glances at the screen. “Wilson? What kind of name is that?”
It’s good to see him joking despite the situation. His way of coping was always humor. “Shut up.”
“Do you love him?”
“No. We had some good times, but…no. Maybe I should feel bad about that, but he didn’t love me either. He’s just mad he isn’t getting his way.”
“You shouldn’t feel bad. We can’t control who we love.”
“Enough about my screwed up relationship. Tell me how you’ve been. Dad said the bike shop is doing well.”
His smile is proud. “It is. I’ve built a solid reputation. Word of mouth is the most powerful marketing you can have.”
“That’s wonderful. Do you enjoy the work?”
“I love it. I never want to do anything else.”
“I’m happy for you.” It was one of my worries when I chose photography, that the joy I felt behind the camera would fade. The novelty would wear off and it would start to feel more like a job instead of a passion. So far, that hasn’t happened.
