AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“What were his injuries?”
Tori squeezes my hand. “El, I’m not sure you should hear all the details right now.”
“I need to know!”
The doctor nods. “He suffered two gunshot wounds to the head, only inches apart. It was very fast.”
Sniffing, I try to control the urge to throw up. “Can I see him?”
The doctor gestures to the nurse, who rushes out. “We have him in a room down the hall.” He stays near me, prepared to steady me when I stand up. A small headrush takes over but it only lasts a second. “Are you okay?”
“Yes, please take me to him.”
Tori walks with us but waits outside the door when we arrive. I need to be alone for this.
Once we step inside, the doctor stops me. “I must caution you. The damage was extensive. I understand you want to see him with your own eyes and say goodbye, but please don’t remove the wrap from his forehead or try to move his head.” The doctor reaches for my hand. “If it were someone I loved, I wouldn’t want them to be traumatized by that image.”
My god.
I feel like I could die on the spot. I want to scream and slam the walls around me. Instead, I give a numb nod. He slips back out the door.
Every step I take toward the pale blue curtain that separates the bed from me feels heavier than the last. My wedding dress drags, catching momentarily on the corner of a floor tile, like it also wants to delay as long as possible.
One last step around the curtain, and there he is. The man I love. The man I was supposed to spend the rest of my life with.
“Alden.” The word comes out in a choked sob.
He’s lying on his back with a thick white bandage wrapped around his forehead. When I get closer, I see it’s under the back of his head too, leaving only his face visible. A sheet is pulled up to his chest.
His skin is pale, and his lips are tinged a dusty blue.
“Den, I’m here.”
I reach under the sheet to find his hand. It’s cool and clammy when I interlock our fingers like we've done so many times before. For minutes, all I can do is stand there and hold his hand with tears falling onto the sheet.
His expression is calm, peaceful. He could be asleep.
“Please, I don’t know how to do this without you,” I tell him, squeezing his hand. I’d give anything in this world for him to squeeze back. To open his eyes and show me all of this is a mistake. A terrible nightmare.
The room is too quiet. Distantly, I can hear the sound of voices in the hall, the beep of medical equipment. Life.
His stillness is disturbing. This man could never hold still. He had to be moving, joking, laughing. No room with Alden in it was ever this quiet.
I’m not sure how long I stand there, holding onto him before the doctor steps in and tells me it’s time to go. His father wants to say goodbye, and then they’ll be moving him.
I nod, and once he retreats, I give Alden’s hand one last squeeze. “I love you.” Careful not to disturb his head, I press my lips to his for the last time.
“If you’re out there somewhere, Den, my window is always unlocked.”
Walking out of that room is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.
The shot the nurse gave me slows me down and puts me in a numb sort of fog that lets me go through the motions. Tori and Mom escort me to the bathroom where I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror.
How did I get here?
I stare at the reflection of a woman in a wedding dress with smeared mascara and wild hair. Only hours ago, Alden was telling me it was the best day of his life. With no idea it was the last day.
I can’t do this.
