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“Nah,” I reply, fishing a beer out of the fridge, “not really into that kinky shit.”
The guys laugh, and I clench my teeth. “Did you not hear the part about the girl Vic is talking to who wants him to call her a dirty slut and shit?”
“Excuse me for not wanting to call a chick names while I’m fucking her,” I mumble.
“Dude, it’s so hot though. I get laid so much more with this app. All I have to do is agree to whatever freaky shit they’re into.”
I pause, the beer bottle lifted halfway to my lips. And right at this very moment, I decide I hate this douchebag. With his stupid blazer and leather shoes and cocky attitude. But I especially hate him because even I know, what he’s saying is fucked up. He’s clearly abusing the app.
“Isn’t the whole point of it to match people up who like the same things? Not just give you the keys to the kingdom so you can get more willing pussy?”
All three of them look up at me like I just started spouting Latin.
“So you have heard of it,” Victor replies, his brows folding inward.
“No. I mean…yeah, I’ve heard of it, but my point is…I think the purpose of it is pretty clear.”
“Yeah,” he says with a tilt of his head, “the purpose is to help these bitches get all their freaky needs met, and to put me in contact with them.” He laughs, looking down at Dash and Brody who both join in, and I’m suddenly so irrationally pissed off and I don’t even know why.
“It’s not a fucking joke!” I bellow, and all three of them shut up.
“Jesus, Beau. Relax.” Brody is staring at me with confusion written all over his face, and honestly, I’m fucking confused too. I’m not sure where that came from, but I do know that I need to get the fuck out of here.
“I’m gonna go,” I mutter as I set the beer on the table and fish my phone out of my pocket.
“I thought you were crashing here,” Dash replies.
“Not tonight, man. Thanks though. I’ll just grab a ride.” As I pull the door open, I feel a hand on my arm. It’s Dash, and when I spin around, I’m met with his concerned expression.
“You sure you’re okay? We were just messing around. We didn’t mean anything by it.”
I shrug. “Dude, I’m just in a weird headspace today. I think I just need to go home.”
“You wanna take a joint with you?”
I can’t help but smile. Out of all of my friends, Dash is definitely the most empathetic. Through every job loss and breakup, he’s been the only one who actually listened while the other guys figured beer and weed would do the trick. At least Dash offers his friendshipandweed.
“No thanks, man. Have a good night.”
With that, I head out of the apartment and make my way down to my dad’s car. I drove here, but I’m still too high to get behind the wheel. It’s only a mile and a half anyway. And the weather isn’t bad for late April. So I take off down the busy road toward my mom’s house.
Maybe a long walk will help clear my head, so I can understand why the hell I got so worked up about that fucking app. I’m not exactly sure why, but for some reason, the first step in chilling the fuck out seems to be looking it up in the App Store.
It has almost a million reviews. And pretty good ones too. Which I assume at first are just a bunch of jerks like Victor, who think it’s a hookup app of the kinky variety.
But they’re not.
Finally! An app that normalizes healthy kinks.
Not your average hookup app. This one actually values kink-positive lifestyles!
I had no idea I even had a kink. Thank you, Salacious! Best sex of my life.
“Jesus,” I mutter. People really will post anything on the Internet.
It’s ultimately curiosity that gets the best of me and has me hitting the download button. I mean…just because I’m looking at it doesn’t mean I’m going to turn into some kinky freak like my dad.
As I reach the crosswalk, I open the newly downloaded app and follow a few prompts like age, sexual preference, location. After crossing the street, I open it back up to find myself at the beginning of a quiz.
