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“I’m so sorry,” O’Neal said, sliding her chair back and standing to come around to his side. “I’m such a klutz.”
Auden winced as icy water shocked the warm parts of him. The waiter said he’d grab some extra napkins.
O’Neal was at Auden’s side, offering a cloth napkin. He gave her awhat the helllook that his mom and sister wouldn’t be able to see.
She pressed the cloth in his hand and squeezed his pinkie—hard—through the napkin.
What the—He almost cursed again, but then it dawned on him. He was still wearing her goddamned purity ring on his left hand. His stomach flipped over. She must’ve seen it when he raised his hands to block her from throwing the grape.
He let her slip it from his finger, the napkin concealing it, and stood quickly. “I’ll be right back.”
Relief crossed O’Neal’s face.
As he headed to the bathroom, he heard his sister say, “Please tell me you did that on purpose. I can’tbelievehe flicked water at you. Hisspitis in there. Gross.”
Auden scoffed. His spit was in there? He thought of all the places he’d put his tongue last night. His sister would have a heart attack if she found out he’d done a whole lot more to her best friend than flick a little water at her. She’d outright die if she had any clue about the things he hadn’t done to O’Neal yet but had fantasized about.
And that thought made him feel like shit. What the hell was he doing?
When he was alone with O’Neal, he saw the woman she’d become, felt that visceral attraction, wanted to take her to bed and show her all the fun things they could do. But when he saw O’Neal with Maya, it dragged his mind back to all the memories of his little sister and her friend when they were growing up. They’d always been kids to him. Something separate from his world. Seeing O’Neal with Maya reminded him how very young in experience O’Neal was—not just sexually but in life. Yes, she’d consented to what they’d done, said she didn’t regret it, but how would he view it if some guy was acting like this with Maya? Not willing to be her boyfriend but sleeping with her under the auspices ofteachingher about sex? Getting off on calling her good girl?
Fuck.The thought made acid burn at the back of his throat.
He’d see it as predatory. Maya was eighteen, but she’d been sheltered. Some smooth-talking guy could tell her the right things and take full advantage probably.
He stepped into the empty men’s bathroom and pinched his temples, the reality hitting him. As much of a dick move as it’d be to back off after sleeping with O’Neal, it’d make him a bigger asshole to keep taking advantage of the situation. He could tell himself he had the best intentions, but he didn’t trust himself not to take it too far. His fantasies about her were far from sweet. Thatteach mething she had was too darkly enticing. He’d already crossed lines last night without planning to.
Icy reality settled in his gut.
Goddammit.
He had to end this.
CHAPTERFIFTEEN
O’Neal’s eyes were gritty as she skimmed a few more news articles. Most of them said the same thing, but she was scanning for any tiny detail that may give her new information. When she reached the last of the articles and found nothing of note, she rubbed the spot between her eyes, a tension headache forming there, and then glanced at her phone.
The screen was black. Of course, it was. She couldn’t deny what that meant anymore.
Auden was officially avoiding her. After brunch two weekends ago, he’d warned her that he’d have a couple of busy weeks coming up with a few papers due and a big swim meet to prepare for, but his lack of texting revealed it was more than a packed schedule. Something about the meal with his mom and sister had changed things, spooked him. Or maybe he’d just decided that what had happened between them had been a mistake. They’d gotten caught up in the heat of the moment or whatever and had made some stupid decisions.
She was trying to be logical about it. It wasn’t like they were in love or dating. She didn’t need to assign emotional meaning to her first time just because society assigned meaning to that. She’d relinquished that notion when they’d made their agreement. She’d known, at least on some level, what she’d been signing up for. Friends with benefits or whatever people called it.
But the virginity part wasn’t what she was upset about. The friendship part was.
If she’d known sleeping with him meant losing their easy connection as friends, she wouldn’t have done it. That would’ve been too high of a price.
And she couldn’t even talk to anyone about it because she was too embarrassed to tell Quyen what she’d agreed to. She didn’t want to look dumb and naïve. And she obviously couldn’t tell Maya.
O’Neal leaned back in the hard library chair, the wood creaking, and closed her eyes. Her bones felt heavy and stiff, the weight of it all pressing down on her. She’d wanted to learn things from Auden, but she didn’t think her first lesson would be how to have a one-night stand and then be ghosted.
If she thought Auden had used her for sex, she could at least be pissed. But that wasn’t the vibe she was getting. She doubted Auden had any trouble getting women to sleep with him. He was gorgeous, smart, and funny—not to mention rich. He didn’t need to go tricking inexperienced freshmen into bed.
Something else had happened.
She was driving herself crazy trying to figure it out.
The sound of a camera phone startled her, making her eyelids fly open.
