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I give her a lopsided smile, one that I hope disguises just how hard my heart is beating. “You’re going to have to be more specific. Lots of things seem to happen when you’re around.”
She snorts. “My best friend Prisha used to call them shen-Annie-gans.”
My smile grows wider. “I’ve never heard such a perfect description for anything. So which shen-Annie-gan are you referring to, specifically?”
She gives me a side-eyed glance. Licks her lips. Then braces slightly, like she’s not sure if she should say what’s on her mind.
“I don’t know where to start.” There’s a flirty, biting edge to her tone that’s almost painfully sexy.
The stomach dropping sensation is back in full force.
I suck in a breath. “Shall we start with the fact that we spent a night holding each other, and even though I didn’t know you, I’ve never in my life wanted to get closer to someone like I did you?”
“Really?”
I nod. Drum my fingers on the steering wheel. “Really. I don’t get… close to people easily. Physically or emotionally. You, however, make me want to do both.”
“I feel the same,” she says softly. “Not a day has gone by that I haven’t thought about that night. Thought about how I want to get that close to you again.”
I know just what she means.
After what happened to my mom, everything I did became about control. If I couldn’t control my surroundings, I could control what I was doing, control what I chose to focus on. If I couldn’t control my shortcomings, I could control what I excelled at. Practice could make perfect.
And if I couldn’t control what had already come to pass, I could do everything in my power to control what happened next.
I was good at it, the whole control thing.
Until Annie came along.
“It’s hard to control myself around you,” I admit.
She lifts a shoulder, and when she speaks, her voice is breathy. “Then don’t.”
It feels like another dare. A challenge I won’t hesitate to take.
“Fine. I won’t.”
I swerve suddenly, turning the car off the main road and down a side street. I pull into the first parking lot I see—a closed strip mall. I park the car and my hand tightens on her arm. She makes a strange little noise, and I, in turn, make the mistake of dropping my gaze to her lips. They’re parted.
Lord have mercy on me.
“Good,” she breathes. “I don’t want you to.”
This back and forth is ridiculous. But it’s enough to make me forget every single last rule I’ve carefully lived by for so many years.
In this moment, the remainder of my control is slipping away. All I can see are those endless golden eyes, all I can feel is that silky smooth pale skin, all I can smell is her warm ocean scent, and all I can hear is her uneven breathing. Jagged enough to tell me that she, too, is feeling a little out of control by our proximity. A little reckless.
I move closer, my hands sliding over her forearms to her shoulders. My hands eclipse her narrow collarbones as I lean towards her, close enough that we’re sharing air.
“Do you want me to kiss you, Annie?”
It’s a rhetorical question.
I already know the answer.
34
ANNIE
