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I stay in the shower for ages, scrubbing and shaving every inch of me as my thoughts threaten to split me apart like atoms. I can’t think about all the sexy, confident women Edier’s been with or I’ll die of nerves. Nor can I think about who he is or what he’s done, otherwise I’ll be knowingly giving my virginity away to a sinner.
In the end, I empty my head. It’s too scary a place to be lost in right now.
Switching off the shower, I towel dry my hair, and line my meds up on the bathroom vanity. Five white pills. Two blue. Two orange. Small, yet mighty, like tic-tacs and promises.
I’m swallowing the last one when there’s a muted thump from my bedroom. Stepping out of the En Suite, I go to switch the side lamp on when a huge hand clamps over my mouth, and I’m shoved up against the wall by a growl and a shadow.
“Don’t scream yet,Mi Cielo,”murmurs a voice, roughened by liquor and lust. “Let me give you a reason to do so first.” In one wicked movement, he rips my towel away, leaving me naked in front of him. “Jesus Christ,” he hisses, dropping his gaze to take me all in. “It’s too late to change your mind, Ella. You’re all mine to wreck and ruin now... Get on the bed.”
I hesitate at his order.
Seizing my upper arm, he spins me around and delivers a stinging smack to my ass.
“Ow!” I gasp, shocked to the core, but unbearably turned on by it at the same time.
“Do as I say, or that happens again,” he threatens. “And keep your voice down or I’ll gag you. You’re not fucking a college boy tonight. You’re fucking a man.” He catches sight of my expression and smirks. “You said you wanted this, remember?”
“You want this too,” I rasp. “I know you do… Ow!”
He delivers another smack that’s dangerously close to the apex of my thighs, jolting me with pleasure and causing a trickle of wetness to smear across my skin.
Holy moly, what was that?
“Look at your perfect ass pinking up for me already.” He nuzzles my neck as he traps me against the wall again with his huge frame. His stubble is leaving delicious marks. His hot breath is scorching my skin. “This is your punishment for making me want you so badly all sense and reason is going up in flames. Do you have any idea what I’m risking by being here tonight?”
“More,” I choke, my breath coming out in sharp, shallow gasps. He’s the first person who hasn’t treated my body like glass in years, and I’m craving the novelty like a drug. My legs are shaking, and I can’t seem to think straight.
“More?” He chuckles darkly. “And I haven’t even crushed your cherry yet.”
A shiver courses down my spine. His words are bordering on sadistic, and my father’s warning swirls around my head.
“He’s damaged, mija…”
But so am I, Papa. So am I…I shouldn’t crave his pain and pleasure, and all the filthy and debasing things his touch promises, but I do.
Walking unsteadily over to the bed, I slide between the white sheets as instructed, but he rips the top one away immediately, leaving me shivering and exposed on the mattress.
“There’s nowhere to hide.” He gives me another of those wicked smirks. “By tomorrow, there won’t be a part of you that hasn’t been fucked by me.”
I hug my knees to my chest as he stands at the foot of the bed and slowly unbuttons the dress shirt he stole from Sam. It’s dark in here, but the amber glow from the En Suite is casting shapes and backlighting the show.His face is expressionless as he loses the garment, and I feast on everything he’s offering—the dusting of black hair, the hard ridges and ripples of muscle, the livid white scars on his tan skin, and the huge tribal sun tattoo that covers most of the right side, rising up to his neck and down past his wrist.
His pants are next to go, and he bobs free, erect, and freaking massive.
I can't do this. I can't—
“Come here,” he orders, as if sensing my panic.
Reluctantly, I crawl toward him.
Bending down he takes my face between his hands, running the rough pads of his thumbs across my cheeks. “Are you scared?”
I nod.
“You should be,” he admits, his voice tinged with regret. “I don’t fuck gentle, even for you,Mi Cielo.I’m not sure I’m capable of it, but I’ll make sure you’re so wet first the pain will be fleeting.”
I nod again, biting my lip.
“Have you ever seen a hard cock before?”
